Please think very carefully before choosing your answer. You have 400 days to complete the quiz. If you fail you may die, or at the least be very, very unhappy for an extended period of time.

Part I - 20 questions - 5 points each Multiple Guess

Take that gum out of your mouth. OK, quiet please. GO!

One. So, what do you think of Y2K?

a. What's Y2K? b. You mean that new kind of 'Special K' cereal with twice as much 'K' for the same low price? It's yummy. c. It's a major computer problem that will affect just about everything in all of our lives d. It's The End Of The World As We Know It (TEOTWAWKI) e. It's TEOTW period

Two. Where is your money?

a. In the banks/thrifts, credit unions b. I have no money - never did c. I have no money - spent it all on sacks of rice and MUNG beans d. I took it out of the bank and I'm not telling you where I put it e. In physical gold, silver, platinum, short term treasuries, coins, cash in small denominations and put options

Three. Things are getting dicey where you live. It looks like Martial Law will soon be declared. You get into your Y2K compliant vehicle with the family and bug out. You've been on the road for 8 minutes when the kids ask 'Are we there yet?'. Very few cars are on the road. There was an unexpectedly widespread problem with engine-command-module control chips. It affects most vehicles and gas is impossible to get. You drive for almost an hour when your car just quits. You are two miles away from your Bug out Palace, so you:

a. Break out the cellular and dial Triple A b. Leave the car abandoned with all of your supplies and hoof it. After 5 minutes of walking the kids ask 'Are we there yet'? c. You pop the hood and see what the problem is. Luckily, you have some spare parts/tape in the trunk so you fix it and get going. Your son commends you for taking that car repair class at the adult school. After 2 minutes the kids ask 'Are we there yet? You say yes, point, and say there it is.

Four. It's 3:00 a.m. You are awakened by a neighbor's dog barking, and what sounds like a ripping sound. In seconds, you are alert. Someone is breaking into the house. They must have found out about all of those yummy mung beans. You remember that the phone lines have, at best, been working sporadically, so you

a. Break out the cellular but it doesn't seem to be working b. Try the regular phone and dial 911. You hear the following message: If this is an emergency press 1. If this is not an emergency please hang up. You press 1 and get: If this is a medical emergency press 1. If this is a domestic violence dispute press 2. If this is....The intruder is now in the house. You hang up and do either 'c' or 'd' below. c. Panic d. Hide e. You get your Remingtion 870 express 12 gauge and are one pump away from 'Go ahead, make my day'

Five. Do you know who your neighbors are and what they do for a living?

a. We have no neighbors, they all bugged out. b. We know some of them a little bit, but not what they do for a living c. Not really, we've only lived in the area for 5 years d. We know the folks on either side of us, and what they do e. We know many of them, including one who is a nurse, another who is a mechanic, and one who is a hunter and fisherman.

Six. You will be convinced that Y2K might really be a problem when:

a. Barbara Walters interviews Paul Milne during prime time on network T.V. b. Larry King has Gary North on (credit for this choice to R.D.Herring) c. Ross Perot, complete with Y2K charts, buys network air time d. There is a bank run, and you cannot get through to your mutual funds or broker e. President Clinton is on the T.V. saying something about a national emergency f. Two major fortune 500 hundred companies have announced they are going out of business due to catastrophic Y2K failures g. All of the above

Seven. It is July, 1999. You live in an area of the country that has a 40% dependency on nuclear power. The NRC publicly announced the forced shutdown for 24 of the 108 nuclear power generation plants in the U.S. due to Y2K related safety concerns. Some of these are in your area. You decide to

a. Do nothing. They can't turn off the juice... that would be crazy! b. Go out and buy a generator, any generator, but they are all gone c. Exercise the gas generator you bought last year, get more fuel and spare parts d. Double check the solar panels, batteries, inverters,etc.. and go to sleep

Eight. It is August 22, 1999. The GPS system clock just rolled over. You are

a. 39,000 feet in the air in a 747 on the way to your bug out place in Bora Bora b. In the North Atlantic on the SS 'Non-Compliant'. The ship has an old GPS receiver c. An international banker making a multi-billion dollar overnight inter-bank loan d. A forward deployed grunt 10 clicks over the fence on recon e. Anywhere on the surface of the planet with a remediated receiver f. At home, playing with your ham radio

Nine. It is September, 1999. There have been some big Y2K failures and some folks are starting to take 'a little bit' of cash out of the bank. You want All of your money (over $9,000), after all it's yours and you worked very hard for it. The ATM is not working again. You go inside your bank and there is a much longer than usual line. It wraps around the lobby a few times. At least there's coffee and donuts. None of the bank staff recognize you since you always go to the ATM. After half an hour, you finally get to a teller. You hand them a withdrawal slip for $9,450.00 along with six types of identification and a blood sample and say

a. Dimes, Quarters, singles, fives and tens please b. Why is the ATM still not working? c. Oh poopie, I forgot the Wheelbarrow d. All of the above

Ten. It is October, 1999. The DOW sinks to 5478.93. Volume is heavy and the advance/decline ratio has been negative for over two weeks. Even the blue chips and high-tech sector show no leadership. All of the analysts are talking about this NEW thing called Y2K and how it may make some companies miss earnings by as much as three cents. You still have 80% of your assets in stock mutual funds. You think you are diversified, after all you've followed the experts advice for someone your age: Large cap stocks, mid-cap stocks, small cap stocks, growth stocks, income stocks. You decide to

a. Listen to the experts: Don't panic, keep the money in stocks and buy on the dips (a.k.a dips buying) b. Take about half out and invest it in foreign stocks for diversification (wink) c. Take about half out and put it in your nice, safe, insured, non-compliant bank d. Sell everything and go on a Y2K shopping spree

Eleven. Happy Thanksgiving. The immediate family is gathered at your house to give thanks and celebrate the holiday. Food rationing started two weeks ago. A look at your table shows

a. Fine china, real silverware, a fresh turkey still steaming, a fresh ham also steaming, potatoes and other vegetables, goblets filled with fine wine. And five different deserts are waiting along with fresh fruits and nuts for later (I'm getting hungry.....oh well, back to the quiz) b. Paper plates and plastic utensils, Turkey TVP and MRE's, and paper cups filled with water from your 55 gal drum. Kool-aid for the kids. Dried fruit, trail mix, and even some chocolate bars for later. c. It's almost empty, you didn't prepare while you could. A neighbor comes by and invites you and your family over for the holiday and shares what they have in return for your chopping firewood for the next two weeks. You are very thankful. You start thinking of what knowledge/skills you have that your neighbor could use.

Twelve. New Years Eve. 11:00 p.m. You are

a. In Times Square b. On your way to Times Square but the subway just stopped suddenly and there may be a problem... at least all of the people are friendly in New York... if a wee bit under the table. c. At home and asleep d. So out of it you don't know where you are and you wouldn't care even if you did know e. At home, reading ' How to Live Without Electricity and Like It' Thirteen. New Years Eve. 11:59:00 p.m. You are watching The Ball in Times Square. As you watch,

a. The ball just stays there. What is going on? b. The ball starts to drop buts seems to get stuck... it still isn't moving... c. The ball drops to the bottom then it's lights go out d. Who are you kidding, only National Guard troops are allowed in Times Square now.

Fourteen. New Years Day. Of all times, your wife, who isn't due for another three weeks, is in labor. Big Time. This will be your fourth child. All were delivered in the hospital. You are very proud that you were there with her for all of them. The first time you took some pictures. The second time you had the camcorder. Since you are a techo-weenie, the third time you had live streaming video and real audio....all of your geek friends cheered upon the new arrival, but decided they had had enough with a close up of the placenta. This time is different. You have no way of getting her to a hospital, even if there was time, which there isn't. You decide to

a. Faint b. Go to that neighbor down the street who is a nurse.... unfortunately there is nobody home c. Get out that book you bought a year ago about 'when there is no doctor', which you never read, and start reading theTable of Contents..... where is it.....where is it..... where (SCREAM)... all three kids are crying d. Deliver the baby yourself using what you learned after reading the book, and previously talking to the nurse about child delivery. It did not go perfectly but both wife and child are alive and doing ok. The other three kids clap and stomp. You collapse, and then the realization.... You have no clue what to do with the placenta.

Fifteen. When will Congress pass meaningful Y2K legislation

a. Never b. When it's too late c. In the summer of 1999 after the bank holiday d. ROFL - (rolling on the floor laughing)

Sixteen. The presidential election of 2000 will

a. Take place as usual b. Take place but the votes will have to be manually tabulated c. Be cancelled or postponed since we are still under Martial Law d. There will never be another presidential election

Seventeen. How many programmers does it take to remediate 10 lines of Y2K broken assembly code?

a. Only one if they are a super techno-weenie b. Two regular programmer pukes: One to make the code changes and the other to perform unit and regression testing c. Three regular programmer pukes : The two above plus one to fix the bug that wasn't found initially, despite testing d. Four regular programmer pukes: The three above plus one to fix the new bug that was introduced during remediation e. What's assembly code?

Eighteen. Who is behind the Y2K conspiracy?

a. Aliens. When they crash landed in Roswell N.M. in 1947 they deliberately left computers (with Y2K problems) in the spaceship. Miraculously, these non-compliant computers were mostly in tact. Reverse engineering was born. Computers were invented shortly afterwards. On Jan 01, 2000 they will be able to come down and just take over. Lucky them. b. Big Brother c. The New World Order folks d. It is not a conspiracy. It is over 35 years of accumulated bad code. We have about 400 days to fix what we can.

Niineteen. What is a mission-critical system?

a. A working toilet b. Heat in Minnesota during the winter c. A system that is critical to carrying out a particular mission

Twenty. How can a lowly peon worker-bee like me help lower the impact of Y2K?

a. Tell you family about Y2K b. Tell your church about Y2K c. Tell your community about Y2K d. Tell your co-workers about Y2K e. Tell complete strangers about Y2K f. Prepare the best you can. Don't reveal specifics g. Pray h. Pray harder i. All of the above

-- Robert Michaels (sonofdust@net.com), November 17, 1998

Answers

Darn... I forgot the extra credit question. It's also worth 5 points

You are trying to tell someone really important to you about Y2K but they are not getting it. You know they are not getting it because they are staring into space with a blank expression...... now their eyes are glazing over...... now they start biting their nails,... their foot is tapping nervously... So, you

a. Shake them violently b. Stop trying for now, knowing that at least they have been 'sensitized' to Y2K and you can wait a bit and try again later c. Give them a copy of Time Bomb 2000 and ask them to make up their own mind d. All of the above e. Only 'b' and 'c'

-- Robert Michaels (sonofdust@net.com), November 17, 1998.

I sent a slightly modified version of this to a friend. He did it while talking to me on ICQ. He's a smart guy who expects a TER of 90+ (top 10%; think of it as an SAT of 1300+) and knows a lot about economics.

His answers:

1) None, it's only a minor problem.

2) -a "I'd be at uni then, so I wouldn't have much of course."

3) None. "I'd be too hung over to drive anyway."

4) d. "Hide-- criminals are dangerous people".

5) b. "My neighbours are assholes who play really loud music at midnight. If all the shit you said DID happen, I'd go to their house with a baseball bat and smash their windows and their stereo."

6) e. "Who's Gary North and Paul Milne?"

7) a. "The power company would never let that happen."

8) c. "I want to go into merchant banking when I graduate."

9) c. "Because he left out a few zeroes and I really have nine MILLION."

10) a. "My parents ARE experts."

11) a. "But we don't have Thanksgiving, so it's a moot point."

12) a. "Milson's Point, actually."

13) none. "By midnight I'd be too pissed to care. And hopefully I'd be onto some girl by then, or guy if I'm really pissed." (This friend once DID come onto a guy when drunk, by the way. The guy was also legless and they ended up making out for half an hour!)

14. none. "As if."

15. a. "The government doesn't panic as easily as you do, Leo."

16. a.

17. a. "And he doesn't have to be a weenie either, 10 lines isn't much."

18. none. "The media, they want to create a panic that sells papers."

19. a.

20. none. "I'm not a worker bee anyway. I'm a stock guy."

This guy is highly intelligent and will probably make himself a lot of money. Joe Blow would be even LESS intelligent than him. Scary, huh?

--Leo

-- Leo (leo_champion@hotmail.com), November 18, 1998.

Great Quiz - and Leo has hit it on the head - the response of Joe Q. Public to this issue is scary. Here's another example.

I had quite a conversation with a freelance tax preparer come CPA the other day - a very clever fellow, always comes across as totally switched on. So I needed some tax advice specifically related to the Y2K question. I was booked in for 30 minutes with him. At the end of the session he says "Andy, I think I need a drink, can I pick your brains for a while".

Two hours later he's pretty trashed, and twitching away big time:-) I didn't mean to scare him but I did answer all his questions according to the research that I've done and of course with my take on things. Then he started to get pretty angry when he bagan to think of the possible implications (I mentioned that dreaded no-no to CPA's - "flat tax".)

He didn't charge me his usual fee. He's going to do some homework.

Regards, Andy

-- Andy (andy_rowland@msn.com), November 18, 1998.

If Joe. Q. Public were to take this quiz they would answer 'What's Y2K?' (choice a) to question one, put down their pencil, and that would be it. I wrote this quiz for our forum members. Perhaps we can come up with a special quiz for the Don't get it's.

-- Robert Michaels (sonofdust@net.com), November 18, 1998.

Proposed Y2K Quiz for Don't Get Its (DGIs)

Assumption: The DGI has at least heard of Y2K.

5 questions - True/False

One. You have read at least 1 Y2K book, and several mainstream press articles about Y2K.

Two. You have spent time talking with at least one computer pro that's actually working on a Y2K project.

Three. You have spent time talking with at least one computer pro that have over ten years experience and have coded in languages like Assembly, PL1, RPG, COBOL, Fortran, C

Four. You have visited at least two Y2K sites and followed interesting links

Five. You have attended a Y2K seminar/talk

Give yourself 20 points for each TRUE answer. Scoring: 0 points - You have 0 to base your opinions on 20 points - You have a little to base your opinions on 40 points - You have made a good start, get more information 60 points - You are well on your way to getting it, assuming you ever will 80 or 100 points - Still DGI? You have enough info to make an informed opinion. What I would like to know is how you justify it. Please post.

-- Robert Michaels (sonofdust@net.com), November 18, 1998.

Good quiz, but you left out "none of the above" as an option. I like the true/false quiz better.

Also, I think Joe Public is alot smarter than you think Leo. They just don't have the facts yet.

-- Buddy (DC) (buddy@bellatlantic.net), November 18, 1998.

Many have been exposed to the facts but they still don't get it because they're in denial. I don't think it's a matter of 'smart'. The emotional acceptance of Y2K isn't easy for anyone, no matter what there IQ is. That's the steepest mountain.

As far as the second quiz, there isn't any 'none of the above' since it's T/F and 5 False answers would be 0 points, or are you saying I missed it somewhere on the first quiz?.

-- Robert Michaels (sonofdust@net.com), November 18, 1998.