old flames

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If you saw THAT old flame on the street today, what would you say to them? Is there something you've always wanted to ask, but didn't have the courage to say ten years ago?

-- Christine (chris@gta.igs.net), September 24, 1999

Answers

I would want to ask an old flame (well, one of them) if things had been different, if that one weekend (full of romance, late night walks and silly photographs by the lake) had ended with more than just a nonchalant parting (thinking that time would stand still to give us time to consider us, really consider us, as more than two people in love who could see each other after two or three years, and know the flame still burned), would we be together now?

-- Michael Besworth (meaford@hotmail.com), September 24, 1999.

Why ask anything? We all do our best at things we have no business doing. Then, when we get older, if we smarten up, we learn to avoid making the same mistakes over and over. Of course, this comes with a sacrifice. Commiting yourself to one path takes the risk of missing out on some other opportunity. But most people are too afraid to look like a loser to risk doing what may turn out to be the wrong thing.

This is why, it they learn how to keep cells from aging, and people start living forever, people will be eager for fascist government. Uh...i better stop here before i continue on one of those tangeants i always go on in the other forums...

-- Mike (mleung@mikeleung.com), September 25, 1999.


I totally agree with you, Mike.

The last time I talked to an ex-boyfriend, I asked him a very important question. "Please take one of my cats?"

And I'm all for my cells living forever, just not too interested in the fascist government part.

-- Christine (chris@mail.gta.igs.net), September 27, 1999.


I would not say anything. Old flames are not worth my time. I had one try to act friendly with me after she crushed me. Why do I need to hang around people who stabbed me in the back and didn't even give a reason? Nothing sounds stupider than "oh my feelings have changed" coming from a 30 year old. :)

-- Eric (ef@kwinternet.com), September 27, 1999.

"Today I passed you on the street, and my heart fell at your feet. I 'caint' help it, if I'm still in love with you." ---with apologies to Hank Williams

Thank goodness for the old romantic notions of Hank Williams. Of course the pragmatic, logical observations of the practical minded seem to prevail in this exchange. But, I would like to fantasize that I would meet that girl of years past, and after perhaps a few awkward salutory exchanges we would find ourselves looking deep into each others eyes, and both of us then feeling a rekindling of that old fire and passion we once knew. We decide to find that little bar we used to frequent. A few drinks, a few fond remembrances, then a touch, a hesitation, an embrace and... and . Ah, well.

-- Sam Redman (sam@samredman.com), September 28, 1999.



I was completely blown away by a guy I dated the first half of 1993. I was 20, he was 25, and I was too intimidated to really be myself. I'd just like to tell him I was way more cool than I appeared. Heh. Well, timing is everything, as they say.

-- Claudia (c_tamburini@hotmail.com), September 29, 1999.

Daisy and I met in high school. I went to a private school and she went to the all girl "sister" school. We dated while in college. She went to school in Holyoke, MA. and I in Connecticut. Visiting her at that college gave me great memories. When she pressed me for a commitment I remembered the advice my father gave me: "Never marry the first girl you sleep with". I knew we needed to have other relationships. So I broke it off. Years later I called her and found her living in NYC. She was polite and told me she meet me for dinner. She was still tall, blonde & beautiful, but showed little interest in me - I assumed she was involved with another. 2 years later we bumped into each other at a seaside bar in Jersey. She was with a girlfriend and another dude. She was still beautiful. I assumed she was with the dude so we hardly spoke. 3 years later I married another old flame I hadn't seen in 3 years. 23 years later I called Daisy to see if she was going to the high school reunion. Wow. What a call that was. Incredibly she asked why I was so rude to her at the bar in Jersey. I said, I couldn't talk because you were with your boyfriend. She paused for a moment, sighed and said, "He wasn't my boyfriend". Damnmit. So I went to the high school reunion and when I didn't see her I left. This old flame taught me one thing: We may lose at the game of love, but it's still love.

-- Jay Gatsby (jaygatsby@msn.com), December 03, 2001.

Why didn't you send just one more letter, I would have answered it

-- Bev D. (bevdrake10@hotmail.com), March 05, 2002.

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