HUMOR: Microsoft Haiku

greenspun.com : LUSENET : TimeBomb 2000 (Y2000) : One Thread

In Japan, Sony Vaio machines have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with their own Japanese haiku poetry. Each only 17 syllables.

A file that big? It might be very useful. But now it is gone.

The Web site you seek Can not be located but Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and reboot. Order shall return.

ABORTED effort: Close all that you have worked on. You ask way too much.

Windows NT crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death. No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked. Today it is not working. Windows is like that.

First snow, then silence. This thousand dollar screen dies So beautifully.

With searching comes loss And the presence of absence: "My Novel" not found.

The Tao that is seen Is not the true Tao, until You bring fresh toner.

Stay the patient course. Of little worth is your ire. The network is down.

A crash reduces Your expensive computer To a simple stone.

Three things are certain: Death, taxes, and lost data. Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream, But the water has moved on. This page is not here.

Out of memory. We wish to hold the whole sky, But we never will.

Having been erased, The document you're seeking Must now be retyped.

Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), October 12, 1999

Answers

Priceless! Love this one for its meta-meaning: Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared. Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

-- Donna (moment@pacbell.net), October 12, 1999.

Ah so, kindly crash.

Clever is as clever does.

Humor heals all things.

-- Scat (sgcatique@webtv.net), October 12, 1999.


Nearly choked on dinner from reading first two lines. Composure regained.

-- David L (bumpkin@dnet.net), October 12, 1999.

Formatting renews;

Your memories are priceless;

Oops, it's too late now.

-- Randolph (dinosaur@williams-net.com), October 12, 1999.


My computer crashed

When I opened a window

Seven stories high.

-- Randolph (dinosaur@williams-net.com), October 12, 1999.



Surfing cyberspace

With wings to fly unfettered --

Ouch! Oh. Firewall.

-- Randolph (dinosaur@williams-net.com), October 12, 1999.


Server busy now

Do not despair, help comes soon

Farm to be beefed. When?

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), October 12, 1999.


I will print this out,

and hang it for all to see,

Its reality :)

-- Rob Michaels (sonofdust@thanks.oldgit), October 12, 1999.


Refresh... Wait... Refresh...

Wait... Refresh... Wait... Yes! Open!

I forgot my post.

-- Randolph (dinosaur@williams-net.com), October 12, 1999.


The perfect retort

Springs brilliantly to mind

Seven posts later

-- T the C (tricia_canuck@hotmail.com), October 13, 1999.



When I posted these on my site last year, I should have clearly stated that they are not actually used on Sony's computers... It was a joke that became an 'urban legend.'

-- PNG (png@gol.com), October 13, 1999.

Bump

-- . (Doomers@like.humor), November 21, 2001.

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