Okay, here's a question that i haven't seen addresses.

i am a smoker..(Please cease with the hissing noises...:))

How the HECK Does one Roll a Cigarette? i have the papers, i HAVE the Yobacco, but every time I try to roll one, it comes out looking like a dyslexic joint....

I figured that if the price goes any higher, or things are as bad as some of us think, tobacco and papers would be a good barter item..

BUT I CAN"T SEEM TO GET THEM TO WORK!!!!!

Any usefull tips would be helpfull... Thanks.

An Irate legal junkie...

-- DavePrime (the_tv_guy@hotmail.com), October 24, 1999

Answers

It is an art, but can be refined with practice. It helps if you "massage" the tobacco, compressing it as you roll. It also helps if you were a stoner like I was in the late 70's. Keep trying Dave, you'll get it.

-- @ (@@@.@), October 24, 1999.

Okay, But how much tobacco should i be putting in ? A handful, a pinch or two...a shovel, WHAT..

HELP ME I'M ABOUT TO um FLAME all I CAN SEE IS FLAME>>>>>>

Just kidding. But truly, Rolling a joint is a bit different, On those you twisted the ends so it wasn't all that difficult, How The HECK, do you roll one so the ends stay open?

-- DavePrime (the_tv_guy@hotmail.com), October 24, 1999.

Go to a head shop, they have weed rolling machines. If you can't find a machine, here's how to you roll your own: Practice makes perfect - take some dried parsley and 1 cigarette paper. Lay paper on a flat surface and sprinkle some parsley onto the center of the paper. Pick up paper and parsely and lick one end of the paper cross-wise. Quickly roll your finger around the paper until you have a torpedo-shaped cigarette. Quickly stuff the cigarette in your mouth and with saliva shape into a cigarette. If you cannot perfect this, take an empty soda pop can and bend it in half. Puncture a hole in the center of the bend and place your tobacco on the center puncture hole. At the tab where you drink, suck on the opening and light the tobacco, this makes an excellent make-shift pipe. Otherwise, if your really worried about getting your nicotine fix, buy a pipe and forget about it!

-- bomber banger (bomberbanger@bomberbangerrr.xcom), October 24, 1999.

Just start out by using a small amount and make them very thin, it's easier. We use to call these pin joints. To keep the ends open just make sure you roll it even all the way along, not narrower on the ends. Give it a good lick on the ends so it don't come apart.

-- @ (@@@.@), October 24, 1999.

Ask your teenager or one down the street.

-- Yes, (This@Buds4.You), October 24, 1999.

From: Y2K, ` la Carte by Dancr (pic), near Monterey, California

Double the length of your paper by licking the glue of the first and pasting a second to it. It will be easier to roll these until you get the hang of it. Your cigs will burn hot and dry, so you'll have incentive to learn. I wonder if you can pick up some menthol additive. And yes, those rolling machines are pretty cheap and they work great. Store finished cigs in a used pack. Then, before beginning to use them "pack" them as you would for any new pack.

Try quitting now, while you have readily available alternative crutches. Cold turkey is almost the only way to go. The other way that works (that I know of) is difficult to administer without special equipment. It involves smoking at randomized times dictated by a timer, and gradually lengthening the average time between smokes. It's a pain.

Former cigarette smoker, here, quit about 15 years ago (except for that one week when I sold my own house... but we won't go there).

-- Dancr (addy.available@my.webpage), October 24, 1999.

When I was a child about 50 years ago, I had an uncle that smoked and he had a special gadget to roll them in. Maybe a smoke shop sells them.

-- smitty (smitty@sandiego.com), October 24, 1999.

Why don't you give George W.Bush a call. I bet he could help you out.

-- (MeLibertarian@TM.com), October 24, 1999.

Once you get the rolling technique down pat, make yourself a Berkeley Bugle out of a toilet paper roll. Man, what a tobacco rush you'll get!

j

-- joint (joint@exhead.com), October 24, 1999.

Put too much tobacco in the paper, smooth it even, then roll from the middle out to the edges.

-- @#$%^ (nottelling@hmmm.mmm), October 24, 1999.

DavePrime,

I am a smoker and was concerned about this too! I just bought a Supermatic II ciggy making machine ($29). Basically, you buy filtered cigarette tubes ($2-$4 per carton) and tobacco (about $7 per carton's worth or about 7 oz). It is REAL easy to use versus the rolling machines. I figure I will roll my own even if Y2K is a BITR because ciggies keep going up in price whereas this turns out to be less expensive per carton. Here is the URL for a place where you can buy online, although I bought the machine (same price as online) from a local tobacco shop. www.cigarettetobacco.com If the URL doesn't work when you type it in you can E-mail them for info at dandr@mindspring.com They are located in N.C. Their phone number is 1-919-9899458. I bought a 50 cartons worth of filters from them and I received my shipment promptly with no problems. They also sell a $39. ciggie maker but I don't know why it is better.

-- Debi (LongTimeLurker@shy.com), October 24, 1999.

WHy don't you just buy a whole heck of a lot of cigarettes? Might be a GREAT barter item! When the hubby was in Desert Storm in 1991 cigarettes and TP were BIG time barter items. A Marlboro was better than a twenty dollar bill, which was useless. (The husband just told me my first statement is a stupid one. I obviously was not too aware of the high price of cigarettes. I DID just figure out where all our MONEY is going, though!!!!! *$&% *#$@*#*&%!!!!!!) Seriously the hubby is a smoker, not a very heavy one. I was stealing his half empty packs from him and hiding them in what I thought was a very good hiding place for possible barter post-Y2K and he just thought he was smoking more than usual until he found my very good hiding place. Now, of course, all the hundreds of cigs I had stashed away are long gone. I think he is planning on just having enough cigarettes to get him through the first month or so (with some careful rationing) then quitting out of necessity. He also is planning on cutting down in quantity as Jan 1 approaches, so the quitting is not so bad.

-- Preparing (preparing@home.com), October 24, 1999.

If you live on an Indian reservation you can by name brand cigs real cheap.

-- no talking please (breadlines@soupkitchen.gov), October 24, 1999.

The reason I am buying cans of tobacco to be rolled is because the storage life should be longer than a carton of ciggies. Anybody know the storage life of cartons or packs? Also, if I were to quit, I would use the patch as it takes the edge off quiting versus going cold turkey. I hear Zyban is good as well.

-- Debi (LongTimeLurker@shy.com), October 24, 1999.

This is wayyy easy to answer. get the rolling paper creased like a gutter at the bottom quarter of the rolling paper. put whatever yer going to roll in the paper by: laying an even amount on one side then laying the other amount evenly on the other side. What it amounts to is leaving the substance much less full in the center of your paper and full on the edges. The lesser or void space in the center will fill up perfectly when you roll. Try not to go back and forth. Roll it in one swoop. Mine always come out perfect (straight like a ciggy) when I put less in the center when I roll.

-- Feller (feller@wanna.help), October 24, 1999.

I hear that Phillip Morris is stocking up on their inventory for y2k. Thanks!

Can you imagine millions of people ALL in nicotine withdrawal ?

-- Cant Say (Chicken@NoWay.com), October 24, 1999.

bomber banger,

Forgive me, but I laughed so hard at your instructions, I had tears in my eyes. Just never dreamed there was so much to it - I'm too old to have ever had a joint. But I wanted to know about rolling cigs, same as Dave. Think I'll pass.

I quit successfully once with the Patch, but that's expensive, destroys your skin, and the "success" may or may not last. Now I'm planning, more or less, what Preparing's husband is - cut down & cold turkey when there's No Choice. So I have the Nico-whatever gum. It's really really nasty. Makes you want to get unhooked fast. I'll be an intolerable bitch for January at least, but (I live alone) ha! Who's going to know?

-- Scat (sgcatique@webtv.net), October 24, 1999.

Once you figure out how to roll, remember, there are increased health concerns from smoking unfiltered (half-grin).

Anyway, I tried it years ago. Rolling wasn't the problem (I had lots of practice in the 70's). I never found a tobacco that I "liked" the taste of. Most were just way too harsh.

Y2K could be a good excuse to quit. It's on my "options" list. Heck, if the price keeps going up, it's going be on my main list soon anyway. Plus, I'm gettin' too old for this stuff....

Tick... Tock... <:00=

-- Sysman (y2kboard@yahoo.com), October 24, 1999.

I used to roll, um, cigarettes in the late 60s, early 70s and it doesn't take too long to get the hang of it. I also used to mix in dried crushed mint leaves for a bit of a menthol effect. Maybe peppermint oil might work? Or perhaps you can buy menthol filters.

I did great on the patch, worked for me--and I smoked moderately for 32 years. If you don't put successive patches on the same piece of skin, you should be okay. Just keep telling yourself about the woman who went on the patch and couldn't handle it, smoked a cigarette without waiting for the heavy hit of nicotine to leave her system. She had a fatal heart attack. That kept me from cheating. The first set of patches have so much nicotine I got a bit dizzy--what a rush!

I think it takes six weeks to complete the patch thing--better start now.

-- Old Git (anon@spamproblems.com), October 24, 1999.

The second I read your post I knew what your problem was. You see [Y]obacco doesn't roll worth a darn. If you could get some [T]obacco it would simplify the problem a great deal. Glad I could help.

-- Lumber Jack (johnsellis@webtv.net), October 24, 1999.

From: Y2K, ` la Carte by Dancr (pic), near Monterey, California

Note to self: Don't stockpile cigs for barter, get the patch, instead.

-- Dancr (addy.available@my.webpage), October 25, 1999.

Explaining rolling is almost as difficult as explaining how to tie a shoe. A demonstration works best. And practice practice practice (til you're ready for Carnegie Hall).

Feller has the best tip. Two fingertip sized pinches of tobacco, one on eachr end of the joi...errr, cigarette paper, then spread it evenly. The corners don't like to rollup, so just work with it. Lick well, then blow on it for 5 seconds...helps the glue set. Once it's rolled, keep your fingers over the seal for about 5 seconds and remove them with a wiping motion to keep from unsticking the seal. Don't roll them too tight or they smoke hot.

Kite and Tops (brands) come in mentholated versions. I suppose others do too. I like a little homegrown mint sometimes. They also include enough papers to finish the whole can (unless yo're really hamhanded). Damn papers sure have gotten expensive.

I find the moister rolling tobacco much nicer than dry readyrolls. Usually come in 6 oz cans. Wish I knew where I could get them for $7. (Can't do online...no credit cards). Cans are well-sealed and ought to stay fresh indefinitely if kept cool and dry. Hoping to be able to afford a case of cans soon.

Speaking of dry...if the tobacco starts to dry out, a half-dollar sized piece of apple peel or orange rind will moisten it up in a couple of days.

As for machines...they break and wear out, then requiere unavailable replacement parts. Learn to roll like a man. A good handrolled doob..errrr, cigarette is a cause for pride in accomplishment.

The Zig-Zag man

-- (ZigZag@capulco.gold), October 25, 1999.

This type of question belongs on the prep forum.

-- Elaine Seavey (Gods1sheep@aol.com), October 25, 1999.

Elaine

I beleive the question was asked over here because Dave realizes that most tech heads nowadays are ex (or current) pot heads.

Deano - who has the hands of a surgeon and has never used a rolling machine in his life! And they never run.........:-)

-- Deano (deano@luvthebeach.com), October 25, 1999.

practice young grasshopper....

-- Billy Boy (Rakkasan@Yahoo.com), October 25, 1999.

Just practice...its not that hard... practice...practice...makes perfect

-- Me (------------@---.---), March 16, 2003.