Some folk make it out to be worse that it actually is (whatever "it" is) and some folk make it out to be better than it is? Which way do you go? Why?

-- Catherine (catherine@cmjcom.com), October 24, 1999

Answers

Oh, it varies with me. I think, in my head, that I am making it sound better than it is - but ... But I know I go the other way, too. Why? Hmmmm .... I don't want people to feel sorry for me (but I want them to respect the difficulties, I suppose).

For years I was known as the "rosy colored glasses" daughter and my Mom told me that the better I made it sound the worse it actually was. I don't know that her observations are perfect, though. Heh.

I wonder why people do that?

Catherine

-- Catherine (catherine@cmjcom.com), October 24, 1999.

Usually--not always--as better than it is. Or rather, I just think what some people are going through, and reflect that I don't have it so touch after all.--Al

-- Al Schroeder (al.schroeder@nashville.com), October 24, 1999.

I have a tendency to make things out to be the best they can be, unless I'm just completely depressed, when everything seems AWFUL. My mother takes the positive attitude thing to an extreme, so I know how irritating that can be and try to moderate my own tendency accordingly. Also, my hugband takes his gloom very seriously and if I try to "look on the bright side" with him, he just gets irritable and grumbles about how Americans want everything to be happy all the time. Hah.

In writing, I try not to spin things at all. Flat narrative, let the reader infer. I don't succeed very often because I constantly forget and put my own spin on what I write, but it is my goal.

-- (viv@rosamundi.com), October 24, 1999.

I tend to tell myself (and others) that it's better than it is... I am one of those who will play up the tiniest bright side as a Really Great Thing, as long as I'm trying to find a way to make it better... the worse it is, the brighter shine I put on those little bright sides. but once I can't deny the badness, it all come gushing out. Which usually makes people wonder how it 'turned' so suddenly. Of course, the truth is, it didn't - only my willingness to hunt for silver linings. And that probably makes me paint it worse than it is, because I'm not just dealing with the present state of Bad, but looking back at everything I tried to ignore. As with most things, the real truth is somewhere in the middle.

-- Lynda B. (lyndacat@bigfoot.com), October 24, 1999.

I think if I had been realistically negative about my life I would not be alive right now.

-- special k (specialk@asarian-host.org), October 25, 1999.