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Famous Last Words

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I'll get a world record for this.

Let me reach in and get your watch out of the printing press.

Hey there's no handles inside these car doors!

Gee, that's a cute tattoo.

Let's ask that group of basketball players for directions.

Here's my Kent state student ID.

It's fireproof.

He's probably just hibernating.

What does this button do?

I'm making a citizen's arrest.

Can we get a vision plan?

So, you're a cannibal.

It's probably just a rash.

Why am I standing on a plastic sheet?

Are you sure the power is off?

Yeah, I made the deciding vote on the jury, so what of it?

No, my shoes aren't untied.

The odds of that happening have to be a million to one!

What duck?

What do you mean, "I'll be back"?

Why is the rest of the Star Trek landing party wearing a different color?

Pull the pin and count to what?

Which wire was I supposed to cut?

I wonder where the mother bear is.

I've seen this done on TV.

These are the good kind of mushrooms.

I'll hold it and you light the fuse.

What's that priest doing here?

You look just like Charles Manson.

Let it down slowly.

Rat poison only kills rats.

I hope they speak English.

OK, I'll go ahead and make your day.

It can't possibly rain for forty days and nights.

I'll get your toast out.

Give me liberty or give me death.

Just take whatever you want, this is a ghost town.

It's strong enough for both of us.

That birthmark on your head looks like 999.

This doesn't taste right.

I can make this light before it changes.

Nice doggie.

I can do that with my eyes closed.

I've done this before.

Well we've made it this far.

That's odd.

Hey that's not a violin.

I'll just slip into the commuter lane for a second.

I don't think we're in Kansas anymore.

You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses on, would you.

OK this is the last time.

Don't be so superstitious.

Now watch this.

This planet has an atmosphere just like on earth.

-- snooze button (alarmclock_2000@yahoo.com), February 10, 2000

Answers

Most ethical administration in history.

-- JB (noway@jose.com), February 10, 2000.

HEY Y'ALL, WATCH THIS!!!! - Famous last words often used by rednecks, most commonly in association with four-wheel drive vehicles and a soon-to-occur spectacular accident.

I watched a barracks roomie sink a new Nissan pickup up to the tip of the radio antenna in what he thought was a great mud puddle to splash through. And he did shout those words before beginning his banzai run.

WW

-- Wildweasel (vtmldm@epix.net), February 11, 2000.

bump

-- . (Doomers@Like.Humor), November 26, 2001.