I absolutely clonked my friend Nick over the head with a grapefruit. Even though I was annoyed with him, I was trying to be funny. However I must of misjudged how hard the grapefruit was and/or how angry I was as hurt him. Is this evil (bearing in mind I didn't mean to hurt him but also I was trying to be funny which is maybe a form of vanity)?

-- Andy Bell (andy.bell@rdf.co.uk), March 16, 2000

Answers

maybe you should consider your actions in the light of recent research which suggests that those who employ grapefruit and other tools for ostensibly bad aims are only temporarily staving off the day when the revolution will come...and annihilate them. Your quandry throws up other problems too. Which is the more evil fruit? Is there a degree of evil associated with each, and where does one draw the line? Are they evil in themselves, or is human agency required to 'activate' the inherent evil contained within our vegetable cousins?

All in all, I would apologise to your friend Nick and try to be a bit more circumspect when it comes to clonking people on the nut.

-- dom (dom@020.co.uk), March 16, 2000.

eggs are a type of grapefruit, and are therefore evil

EVIL I say

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-- labia (ginger@winky.com), March 16, 2000.