Not a lot of people know this, but it's Jonno's borthday tomorrow. Is there a more special Geordie? Loves the area, loves its history, loves the club, a lovely friend to us all and he makes great scrambled eggs and mushrooms. Happy Borthday, Jonno, my darling.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Answers

Many happy returns!!!

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Squashed toms & stuw & breed n butta.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Happy birthday, Jonno!

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Many o' them, young man.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Many thanks. It's a bit early for this thread to appear but I'm a bit busy tomorrow so I'll say a few words now.

Aye, some 50 years ago today, me mam, being approximately 1 month overdue, was told by the Doc that maybe she'd better get along to the hospital. This redoubtable lady finished her shift doon the pit (I made that bit up for local colour) packed a bag and jumped on the No. 11 bus (I kid you not) from Seghill and set off for St Mary's in Jesmond. Next morning at 0855 on 17/05/1950 Jonno was dragged kicking and screaming "Toon Army" into an unsuspecting world.

It's a source of great pride to me that I was born in the North East at all. Me Dad was a Londoner (Spurs fan apparently) and they lived in London at the time. As luck would have it, me mam decided that she would like the support of her mother, my grandma, during the later stages of the pregnancy. Me grandma had a modicum of experience in these matters as me mam was the youngest of ten. So me mam headed North, (much like one imagines many Yorkshire women might have done so that their sons could qualify for the cricket team) and had me born in The Golden City. I just think there is so much romance in that story - thanks mam.

It is a credit to me mam, God rest her, that I was born at all. In the early days of her pregnancy, me dad went round to her flat and gave a bottle of gin to her flatmate with a message to give it to me mam and tell her to take a very hot bath. Me mam, told me, with considerable vehemence and disgust for such a loving and gentle soul, that, "Aa poured it straight down the sink". Whenever I hear a discussion on abortion nowadays (me mam only told me this story in her latter years) I reflect on the fact that a bottle of gin once stood between me and total oblivion - much the same as nowadays I hear you cry (-;

For a year or 2 we lived in London (although sadly I was not allowed to go to the 1951 and 1952 cup finals) and then, just as I was developing an appalling accent (ow - mummy ar've forlen owva), the strains in the relationship (a euphemism for the beatings handed out by me dad) became too much for me mam, she crossed the road to the police station, battered and bruised, with 2 babies in tow, and a single suitcase.

The police, gave her a ride to the station, gave her some money for the train and one of my earliest recollections is as a 2-y-o going down an escalator with me mam on her flight back to the North East. All this misery for me poor mam, at least ensured that I was brought up as a Geordie as well as having been born one, and of course, that Aa would lorn te taak propply.

Me mam was an angel of a woman, extremely loving, extremely hard- working. There was one stage after me grandma died that she was doing 3 jobs a day in an attempt to stave off the poverty that ground us down. I recall furniture being repossessed, electricity being cut off, and all manner of such indignities but she fought hard and succeeded in keeping her family together, and instilled in me a fine set of values which I try hard (not always successfully) to live up to.

It is her I think of more than anything at this time of year. Whatever qualities I possess as a human being, I know I owe it all to me wonderful mam. God Bless Her.

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Fifty. As I said elsewhere - it's the number on my shirt, my age, the year of my birth, and the scoreline of an all time favourite match. What with the planets being in alignment as well, this remarkable confluence of events must surely portend something momentous. It's got to be worth a bottle of Broon at least. (-;

So, looking forward to the next half-century, in the desperate hope that I will see United win something before I get the Red Card from the Great Referee in the Sky, it has always been my ambition, and I'm now a just a little bit nearer my lifelong goal, of becoming The World's Oldest Man.

I know I already sound the part. (-;

Many thanks for the good wishes Lots of Love

Jonno-five-o

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Happy Birthday Jonno! Have a great day tomorrow! (:o)

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Jonno

I've said it before but I will say it again. All the best people are born in May.

Many happy returns and here's to another 50!

Have a great day, best wishes and all that mushy stuff

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Born in St Marys ? Me too , cannit remeber it like :- ) A heartwarming story indeed and no wonder you feel like that . Awrabest Jonno , hope the next 50 are enjoyable , ill drink a toast the neet .

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Have a great day tomorrow, whatever you're up to. Howay 50. Here's to the next half of your life. I'll remember to drink your health tomorrow.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

I'll be raising a glass to you tomorrow Jonno.

Best of luck with the next 50!

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

All the best, Jonno, for the big 5-0 and many, many more to follow.

We haven't met in person that often and, have had one difference of opinion over the years (;-)but you are and always will be the epitome of all that's best about our Geordie Nation for me.

Fifties Fan and I will raise a glass in HK to you tomorrow, along with many others, I'm sure.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!!!!!

Love from val.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

I think you've started a "St. Mary's" thread Jonno.

Lovely, lovely story mate. Very best wishes for your half century, and many more to come.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

A celebratory drink in the Strawbeery mebbes?

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Happy Birthday Jonno! You are indeed a credit to yer mam. All the best to you for the next 50yrs! Enjoy your celebrations! :-D

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

From one St marys lad to another. All the best Jonno. Thats a cracking story of your early years.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

What a moving tribute, Jonno, my keyboard is getting used to a sprinkling of tears since discovering the bbs, but that was special. I'm almost afraid to ask, but was the man who got your mam pregnant ('father' does too much credit by the sounds of it) a Newton Heath supporter by any chance? I can't help but feel that this would answer quite a few questions.

All the best tomorrow as always mate.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

What's all this St Mary's bigotry I'm detecting?!?! I was born in the QE in Gateshead and I'm just as good as you lot ;))

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Softie

My dad may have been a bad sort but that sort of innuendo is a little OTT surely? (-;

Me mam always said Dad was a Spurs fan.

It's always difficult to know what drives and motivates people to do the things they do, especially when they cause pain to others. However, me mam did say that dad was a Desert Rat in the 8th Army and had had some bad experiences. He would apparently wake up screaming in the night on occasion. Who knows what effect this might have had?

Maybe without his war experiences he might have behaved decently - who can say? But it's a very poor defence for the offence of wife beating, so serious it resulted in the miscarriage of a 3rd child. No it's hard to say anything good really and his surviving brother speaks badly of him also, apparently.

I met him just once and we were total strangers and unable to engage in meaningful conversation.

Much the same as most Spurs fans I've met ... (-; (You've got to smile haven't you?)

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Many apologies Jonno, I should have thought before I typed ;-)

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Well it's now Wednesday in Japan and I'd like to bring this thread back to being happy. Best wishes Jonno, you've brought a smile to this face so many times I don't care to count. Hope you have a good day.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

All the best Jonno, howay 50! Mind you, I can tell you (switch on Pit Bill impression) being 51 is even bliddy worse than 50...

And thanks for the evocative posting(s). Reverting to my more normal pedantic mode, you might want to note - for the many times you'll want to reuse the material (well I do anyway) - that the ex-Maternity Hospital in Jesmond was the Princess Mary, named after a slightly more recent figure than the St. I know all you lot can be excused on the grounds that you were 0 years old at the time, but I worked there so I remember! Just in case you were wondering, I'm not quite old enough to have been there when young Jonno put in his first appearance...

The services transferred to the RVI about five years ago, and the old buildings have been converted into luxury (=geet expensive like) apartments. I went to have a look out of interest, and found it oddly unsettling to think that where once the women of Tyneside had laboured to deliver the next generation of (unwanted) workers, Jesmond's high-rollers would now be sipping their Perrier. Hmmm.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Re- Princess Mary Hospital

Wasn't it called St Marys and then change its name to the Princess Mary??

I'll have to check my birth cert. as both me and the little'un were born there.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Many happy returns fifty-something Jonno lad. Smashing tale. To think that if it hadn't been for GNER (version one) you might have become a dodgy market trader in cockernee land. Here's hoping for that happy ending you referred to. The one involving the silverware that is.

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Once again as a pedant I would like to know Who is this "Thread" and why are people telling him/her that it is Jonnos Birthday?

In all seriousness whats it like being so old?

Hope you have another 50 Jonno, and we keep having 5-0 as well

Drinks all round here!!!

-- Anonymous, May 16, 2000

Dr Bill,
I'll consider that a compliment, rather than your dislexic fingers hitting the 5 key instead of the 6. :-)

-- Anonymous, May 17, 2000

As a man of my word I will now have to go to the pub and raise a glass to Jonno as promised....

Life can be hell ;-))

-- Anonymous, May 17, 2000

Once again many thanks to all for the good wishes.

My posting started off as one paragraph about the circs of my birth but then grew into a self -indulgent tribute to my greatest all time hero. I enjoyed writing it. I'm glad it was appreciated.

BTW Dr Bill is correct (He's very rarely wrong IMHO) re the hospital which was Princess Mary's not St Mary's. I can only put the error down to senile dementia.

-- Anonymous, May 18, 2000