What personality trait in others do you dislike the MOST? I mean, what makes you automatically write off someone as a jerk not worth knowing?

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

Answers

I don't know if this would be considered a personality "trait" per se, but if someone has a habit of using the word "fuck" 3 times in a 5 word-sentence, I generally think they're stupid.

If someone assumes I'm racist (and use racist language) because I'm southern, that will piss me off.

usually, I'll say something, though: give them a chance to backup before I completely write them off.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

People really annoy me when they start spouting off about other people's situations that they know nothing about. Like if a couple broke up, and this person just starts talking about why one person left the other person, but he or she never even talked to the couple to find out why they broke up. That bugs me. If you don't ask what happened, don't blabber on about how you think you could fix things, and DON'T EVEN start to talk about how it will affect your life, since you haven't even taken the time to get in touch with the people that are now making your life apparently miserable.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

Nicole, I hate it when people do that, too. It's like they don't care enough to contact the people involved -- they just wanna shoot their mouths off or something.

I hate liars.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

wow, Gwen, I guess the fog of post root canal has lifted, huh? You're posting questions at a rate that would make Socrates proud.

I live in the South too, and I hate "fake" Southern Hospitality (and these people know who they are.) I have some relatives who are very skilled in the sarcastic aside while serving you a meal, etc. like you won't be able to tell what they really mean.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

the stuff that makes me craziest is mostly about getting around new york. like, people who stand in the doorway of the subway train and won't move to let people on or off. people who walk down hallways on the left instead of the right. people who stop their cars in crosswalks when the light changes and don't back up.

i worry sometimes that i'm going to get in trouble someday, crossing paths with one of these idiots. i've already developed a neat little hip swing that wacks my big bag against those people who stand in the train doors.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

Word, Sarah. My father completely body checks those door blockers, but I believe a not-so-friendly bag shove is the way to do it.

I've been teaching recently, and I noticed that I completely write off people who ask questions that they know the answers to, just to show how smart they are. These are usually technical questions that have nothing to do with the class.

I'm also quite fucking put off by fucking winking fucks. (That one's for you Gardanna! :oP) But, I really do dislike winkers. I feel most winks are insincere.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

People who make stupid sexist generalizations, like a woman who will make cute (huh) jokes about "training" her husband or treating him like a child because "men are all just little boys in long pants" (yes, someone really said that), or a man who will tell jokes like "why do women have legs" or push me aside from an open car hood saying "No, no, I've got it!" or just anyone who pulls the kind of Mars/Venus assumptions that would lead me to believe that this kind of person and I would not be compatible friends....

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

Erika's answer reminded me of one of my pet peeves from my university days: People who sit near the front of the lecture hall and bombard the prof with endless stupid questions.

-- Anonymous, July 28, 2000

Dwanollah, I agree with you on that one. But I have to include people that make generalizations based on ethnic groups such as "Chinese people are the worst drivers". I've heard that one before. Grrr.

-- Anonymous, July 29, 2000

People who never, ever have anything nice to say about anyone other than themselves drive me mad.

-- Anonymous, July 29, 2000

Just as bad are the folks who go on and on about their own lives without even a cursory "how are you?"

I also tend to write off people who are zealously Christian. I tend to look at things both skeptically and scientifically so I can't ever have too much to share with someone like that. I do think spirituality and religion can be intersting and important, though. I just can't stand that passive, unquestioning acceptance of "God's will."

Of course bigots and sexists suck big toe, too.

-- Anonymous, July 29, 2000

I think Fire Ants are jerks (and yes, I do have a bite on my toe.)

-- Anonymous, July 31, 2000

I couldn't agree more about the NYC stuff - I too use my gym bag as a shield. I don't like when people say racist stuff - even within the confines of a joke - it turns me right off of them. I don't like when people use poor grammar. I don't like when people are mean to other people - especially waiters, fast food workers, bus drivers, etc. I don't like it when people where street clothes in the gym. I don't like it when people talk *really loudly* on their cell phone on the bus. I don't like it when people come to the bar where I work and don't know what they want to order. What, they're surprised they're in a bar? They were blindfolded until they got there? I am a finicky bitch, it would seem.

-- Anonymous, July 31, 2000

but finiky in just the right ways!

-- Anonymous, July 31, 2000

racist/sexist/homophobic remarks. Those are big. And, of course, the people who fret about how 'pc' the society that won't put up with such remarks is. Yeah, cry me a river.

After being burned a couple of times, I'm very wary of people who like to be 'upfront' with their feelings. These are the same people who like to clear the air every couple of days. These are not, contrary to what they might tell you, emotionally mature people, but incredibly self-centred. Run far away.

-- Anonymous, July 31, 2000

People who get water all over the bathroom floor after they take a shower. What's so hard about toweling off while standing IN the tub?

-- Anonymous, July 31, 2000

How could I have forgotten the loud talking cell phone users with nothing to say?!? Gawd they're awful!

-- Anonymous, August 01, 2000

*Sexist/homophobic/racist remarks, even jokey remarks along the lines of "oh, women always ___" or "men ___" as if that can possibly be true. *People who won't "admit their own dorkiness" (TM Dinah), especially Lit students (often graduate-level) who are so caught up in verbal masturbation about some theory, they'd rather die than admit they go to Wal-Mart, watch TV, and have been known to listen to Richard Marx on the radio. Or whatever. *Visible Christians. I probably won't agree with them anyway, and anyone who feels compelled to wear things attesting to, or talk constantly about, their religion really needs to get a hobby, IMNERHO. *Anyone who makes me carry the conversation single-handedly. For God's sake, if you're in a social situation, come prepared with some talk about the weather, the last movie you saw, or what you're doing this summer. It's not too much to ask. If you can't do it, stay home, or be prepared for others to judge you as a sullen, boring jerk. *People who think they are really wonderful and genius-like artistes. No one I know who really qualifies for that kind of label is arrogant enough to spend their time talking about it, so if you *do* spend all your time talking about how you're a "poet" or "artist," plus you're about eighteen, it's more likely you're suffering an identity crisis than anything. And no one is impressed. *People who think any kind of meanness directed at animals is funny. *People who clearly buy into a lot of stereotypes. *People who are terribly enamoured of their own authority. *People who don't use their damn turn signal. Yes, you caused me to miss the light. Why? You sat there at the light ruminating on no doubt important questions such as: "Is it time to take the fuzzy dice off my truck mirror and replace them with something more sophisticated, such as my woman's panties?" In the meantime, I waited for you to go, because you have the fricking right of way, and then you went, but you turned, so *I* could have turned, but too late! The light has changed! Perhaps I can turn at the next light -- if, that is, your twin brother is not behind you in his own truck, pondering his own life-shattering questions that prevent him from utilizing his arm in such a way that it would impact the turn-signal stick conveniently located RIGHT THERE on the steering wheel.

I think I'm having a bad afternoon, or something. I can't usually think of this many things I hate about people.

-- Anonymous, August 01, 2000

"Verbal masturbation"?! LoL, love the choice of words! Anyway, the people that bug me are the ones that will always pretend to be your friend wen you're around, but as soon as you're gone they start trashing you. Don't take it personally though, they do it to everybody else they know too!

-- Anonymous, August 01, 2000

I hate it when I spend years hanging out at another bulletin board, and I make friends there, and I have a good time shooting the shit with my friends on said bulletin board, and I meet cool new people all the time,

and then I hear people say that my friends and I are cliquey and exclusive and that we shouldn't be so friendly with each other online.

Like, EXCUSE ME for paying $15 a month for my Internet service and using it to have FUN, instead of splitting all my time online equally amongst every single person who ever posts on Mediarama.

I mean, I guess the people who disliked my posts on Mediarama should call their ISPs and ask for refunds, huh?

Fuck.

I'm sad, y'all. First I was mad, but now I'm just sad.

-- Anonymous, August 01, 2000

Gwen, honey, I'm sad too. I'm sad that my first post to your fabulous forum has to be on this subject. I'm sad that the place where I met so many amazing people who became real friends has turned into a source of angst for people I care about. I'm fucking annoyed that people can't see what's going on, and when it's spelled out for them, they go nuts on someone who used to consider them friends.

And I'm sad that you're sad.

On a happier note: now you can use the time you would spend lurking/posting there to do something productive.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

"Productive"? What is this word -- "productive"?

I love you, Pooh.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

gwen, pooh--don't you start getting clicquey over here!

Nice to hear from you again, pooh!

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

What are you going to do about it if it does get cliquey, Shelly? Throw a tantrum, or be all passive-aggressive with your posts?

You know I love you, don't you Shelly? And I love you too, Pooh. And Gwen, you know how I feel about you. I know you do.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

Nicole, I belong to one clique. The only members are me and my mirror, but I was thinking of asking Suki to join. That gal is a pistol.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

Yeah, I like Suki too. I wonder where she has been? Maybe she is on her vacation to the Bahamas.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

Maybe Suki got mad and left cuz I called her a ho.

-- Anonymous, August 02, 2000

I hate people who use their cell phones while they're driving. I keep hoping that one will veer off the road and cause bodily harm to themself (is that a word? I don't care if it's not.)

I hate spandexed bicyclists that squeeze between cars and the edge of the street, then hide in your blind spot. I once saw an idiot do this to a car in the right lane; when the light turned green she put her head down and started peddling straight ahead while the car took a right and she slammed into the car. The driver couldn't see her and the bicyclist never bothered to look at the car's turn signals. Muahahahah!!

I hate manipulative people. I hate abusive, controlling users and the poor idiots who get trapped into relationships with them, who then defend the assholes even when they stop using the 'I fell down/I bumped into' defense for all the bruises. It's so hard to watch, and after awhile all you can do is be scared for them from a distance.

I hate smarmy, name droppers who talk about their goofy connections to third rate celebrities with greasy smiles on their faces, then prompt you with cliched pauses to ask The Question that will reveal another reason why they're so damned wonderful. (Dedicated to a coworker.)

I hate it when people on chatrooms and forums spell 'lose' as 'loose', as in 'I want to loose a few pounds.' I'm in a really bitchy mood today and I could go on and on.

-- Anonymous, August 03, 2000

Dude - the lose/loose thing makes me nuts! One time, I can understand, a typo maybe, but over and over? Hoo boy, it makes me happy to see someone have the same peeves as me. Thanks!

-- Anonymous, August 03, 2000

I've seen the lose/loose thing so many times, I thought loose was the Canadian spelling.

-- Anonymous, August 03, 2000

i really hate when poeple think their better then me! i may not be peerfect, but i try to be a nice person to everyone.

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

Rilly, floosie, don't let the turkeys get you down. And don't be nice to everybody, either, it just makes you look like a good victim.

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2000

I hate people who are rude to... well me, specifically, but in general, to waiters/waitresses. I went to lunch with someone recently who kept pretending the waitress wasn't there when she came to take our order, then didn't even look at her when he did finally order, then YELLED at her for forgetting the lemon in his iced tea. He was a rude bastard and I decided I didn't want to work on his pathetic editing project and he paid for lunch and I left a huge tip with a note saying how sorry I was that she had to suffer so many fools on a daily basis. Rude people... I can't understand them. I think the whole conspicuous consumption thing has gone way too far when you're flashing your nasty old Rolex for everyone to see and can't even manage to scrape together a decent tip for the woman who serves you lunch, but looks like she'd rather be basting you with the special sauce...I need to find my soothing lotion now.

-- Anonymous, September 11, 2000

Things that drive me nuts: -People who go to, let's say, London for a week, and then come back spouting an affected, fake accent and expect us to believe it... "Do we need to get some petrol?"; -Reality TV - I HATE HATE HATE it... like I cannot get enough rude, nasty, petty, "Lord of the Flies-esque" behavior on the bus everyday? -Trendy terms such as "My bad" or "Give me the 411" -Inane, unnecessary, loud cell phone calls in close quarters; -Ebonics; -Grown women who speak like mall girls - ending their sentences in an upward inflection - as if everything is a question; -People who do/say visciously hateful things under the guise of being Christian; -Celebrities who admoinish me how to think/vote; -Litterbugs; -Those "salmon-to-spawn" folks who try to shove ONTO the elevator before passengers have gotten off; -Being asked at the grocery checkout counter if I want to contribute to JERRY's KIDS and when I answer no, the clerk looks aghast and condemning; -Men who overtly "rearrange" themselves in public; -People who constantly slam t

-- Anonymous, September 18, 2000

Yeah, visible Christians skeeve me out. Religion is A-OK by me but, like Disco Stu, they shouldn't advertise. I had my car swiped by a big van once and as we pulled off the road to exchange insurance, I saw the Jesus fish on the back and just knew this guy was going to be a huge asshole. He was, and there's a fun story in it...I hesitate to tell too much of it because it makes me sound petty, but he called the next day and asked to speak to my daddy about the accident. Well, I'm 26 and my daddy hasn't solved my problems for me for quite a few years now, and I basically just shut this guy's shit down. (nevermind how...it was petty. heh.) What else...uncovered sneezes and wet hacking coughs, being unkind to clerks and waiters, public butt scratching and package shifting, old or aggressive men who leer and try to make eye contact at places like gas stations (look all you want, I may be looking too, but for the love of Jeebus be discreet about it unless you want to find out if I think you're gross!) That's all. I'm really not too peevish.

-- Anonymous, November 01, 2000