Item from today's paper:

Study: Teen athletes straight

CHICAGO - There may be something to the stereotype of the clean-cut high school jock.

A survey of more than 14,000 teen-agers found those who participated in team sports were less likely to use drugs, smoke, have sex, carry weapons or have unhealthy eating habits.

The study was published in the September issue of the Archives of Pediatrics & Adolescent Medicine, published by the American Medical Association.

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Somehow I don't find this surprising.

-- Ken S. in WC TN (scharabo@aol.com), September 15, 2000

Answers

Another organization that many of you might find good for your kids is High School Rodeo. http://www.nhsra.com/ These kids are held to very high standards (by today's standards). There is no smoking, drugs, drinking or profanity allowed or bad attitude. The rules (at least in Iowa) are applied equally to all kids. They have to be doing well in school and stay out of trouble with the law.

Our daughter competed for only her senior year and I wish we had found it sooner - it would have kept her out of trouble. As it was the year she competed she went from a so-so student to an honor roll student and stayed out of trouble.

Because the rodeo's are all over the state, the parents are involved and right there with the kids - how many teens do you know that want to spend a week-end with their parents?

Here in Iowa the high school rodeo families are like a very large extended family and I really miss seeing them on a regular basis. My husband has been taking a kid we know to the rodeos because his family hasn't been that supportive. This kid broke his arm and my husband had to take him to the nearest hospital, when he got back a family camped next to him had made them supper. He didn't even know them - had never met them before. This is the kind of organization it is. The kids reflect this too. While they can get rowdy at times (what kids don't), they are polite and helpful and right there if anyone needs them.

-- beckie (sunshine_horses@yahoo.com), September 15, 2000.

I agree with the article that teens who are busy with extra-curricular activities are into less trouble than others, and generally have better grades. Often the valedictorian and salutatorian are athletes. What I DON'T like to see however, are coaches that push the kids so hard that all of the fun is taken from the activity.

I had one such coach. As a mediocre basketball player in high school, to tell of it I use the analogy that "You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear." At least a "sow's ear" is better than what the coach called me while belittling me at half time after which I had just played the best game of my life. I don't remember how many fouls I got that game, but the coach got three technicals. That was unheard of in those days. A few days later during practice when he had one of his daily fits of flash temper, turning beet red, veins bulging, fists clenched, he started attacking me mentally again and I simply told him "I quit." I then went to the school office to tell them, then showered and left. Several other players had had enough, and in my support left the team too. I managed to convince them to return however, since I deemed it my problem.

While you may think it serves no purpose in telling this, I am reminded that good did come from this. I am remined that perhaps the coach taught me more than he should have, for I learned to stick up for myself that day and since. Think of me what you will about not being a team player, but youth should be encouraged, not belittled. All of my teammates knew what had transpired and did not blame me at all for leaving.

While I did not care for the coach nor the man, I did respect him for teaching remedial reading to former drop-outs and others. It was learned some 25 years later that he had a disease that affected him mentally.

-- Notforprint (Not@thekeyboard.com), September 15, 2000.

My kids are proof of this!My kids played every sport that came along-- They were in the top 10 in their class. Loved school and had lots of friends. My son started swimming when he was 7. We got up every morning but Sun. at 5:30(6 days a week-year round). He went to college on a scholarship.One cold icy morn I ask him if he still like swimming he replied "yes or I wouldn't do it" I told him that I just wanted to tell him -that when he didn't want to do it anymore it was ok! After a long pause he replied " But what would I do if I didn't swim--I'd probably be like "Johnny" and "Sam"! They do really stupid stuff, mom! That was when he was 11years old. I never ask again and He is still at it after 14 years!!No jail,arrests or problems with any of them!It was lots of time and money well spent in my opinion!

-- Debbie T in N.C. (rdtyner@mindspring.com), September 15, 2000.

Ken, I couldn't agree with you more. My oldest was in team sports but I was too heavily swayed by fundamentalism--in particular those who slam all sports, women being outgoing/acheivers, etc.etc.and I pulled her out. I've "seen the light" concerning cookie-cutter Christianity and believe the I can please and glorify the Lord ebven if I'm a- wearing jeans, have short hair, participate in group activities, etc. But now I'm drifting off topic....old oldest is 14, and our "plan" (smile) is to keep that kid pretty busy--so busy, in fact, that she will not have the time, energy, or inclination to do "wrong". Lets see...yeah, I reget pulling on b-ball, but she's in choir, drama, art club, and she fellowships weekly at a Vineyard youth group. Team sports teach co-operation, teamwork, and desire to excel. I'm all for it! Hey--our school also makes band mandatory thru Jr. High; they have found that playing a musical instrument seems to have bearing on overall higher academical achievement.

-- Beth Weber (talmidim88@hotmail.com), September 15, 2000.

Another excellent activity would seem to be a Chess Club. Teaches logical thinking and planning ahead in a short time constraint.

-- Ken S. in WC TN (scharabo@aol.com), September 15, 2000.

Personally I never saw this as true. When I was in high school, the jocks (including those in whatever that Christian Athelete group is called) loved to haze each other and any other students they came in contact with. And for sure they smoked pot and used lots of alchohol off campus. I wonder if these pollyannas who write these articles about how wonderful team sports are were ever in team sports.

I'd say about only people team sports might make a difference for are marginal students who happen to be gifted atheletes. The hope to be pro might be enough to keep them in school and struggling with classwork enough to stay qualified for the schools sports team.

-- Hermit John (ozarkhermit@pleasedontspamme.com), September 15, 2000.

I think public schools and parents push too much emphasis on sports. If a kid is not athletic, he/she is labeled a loser. The coaches who rant over kids not wanting to play, "You're throwing away the best years of your life." If high school sports end up being your glory days, that is a pathetic life, indeed.

My kids like sports, just NOT competion sports. Dance, tennis, horsemanship. 4H, FFA, Chess Club, Junior Search and Rescue, skiing, volunteer work, and ANY activities that have wholesome Youth/Elder interaction will keep kids too busy and accountable to get into trouble, AND give them the skills for successful adulthood.

What do school sports offer? An outlet for agression and an US vs. THEM mentality.

-- Laura (gsend@hotmail.com), September 15, 2000.

Hermit John, what you speak of did not occur when and where I was during high school in the 60s.

The school my daughter attended has standards for athletes far above what the other students are subjected to. A beer drinking session always made it back to the coach, and the boys or girls were benched for at least one game, or other appropriate punishment was meted out. They learned very quickly to abide by the rules that they agreed to at the beginning of the season for whichever sport they might be in. No hazing or anything of the sort occurred, and the kids didn't group themselves in cliques. Perhaps this is because the school is small though and not the norm for bigger schools.

As for studies and grades, for the several years that I am familiar with, the valedictorians and salutatorians always came from sports participants. Also most or all of the students named in this school by the Kansas High School Activity Association to receive the "Outstanding Citizenship Award for Male," and the "Outstanding Citizenship Award for Female" were also athletes. This award deals with with school involvement, community involvement, grades, and the opinions of teachers and fellow students alike. Since there are always more non athletes than participants, you should realize that just being an athlete doesn't mean that only athletes will be chosen.

I also realize that good citizens and those with good grades don't have to participate in sports, and that there are many other things that one can stay busy doing. Like many of you, I readily agree that too much emphasis is placed on the winning, not just the playing.

-- Notforprint (Not@thekeyboard.com), September 15, 2000.

Laura That was a perfect post from my experience. I was a sport jock in school and I'm ashamed to say we were monsters! We hazed, took drugs to try to increase performance, smoked and generally everyone seemed to turn their heads when we got caught. But to be fair that was only the big 3 football basketball and baseball. The win at any cost was what we learned! I homeschooled and sent my kids to private schools.Ha....Kirk

-- Kirk Davis (kirkay@yahoo.com), September 16, 2000.

I'm ashamed to say that I agree with Kirk--we were holy terrors. Did every thing wrong and covered it with Letter Jackets. The best way to fool a parent is to be a jock.

I also think grade and high school sports are played to seriously. Usually the coach is some wanna be sports hero who never made it. He/she than tries t be a superstar thru his players. I remember when it was still a game and if you practiced you played ! Now you have to be Micheal Jordon in the 5th grade or ride the bench. Another depth marker to prove how low we,as a society have sunk !

Oh yeah--ya'll keep believing your kids are angels---Hell's Angels ! LOL

-- Joel Rosen (Joel681@webtv.net), September 16, 2000.

Oh boy. Where do I start??Most student athletes are role models and clean-cut All-American boys?? Not in my world. I went to school in the late 60's/early 70's (class of 71). The jocks were the biggest drinkers and partyers in the school. And the steriod rumor flew then, tho' never proven. And this is in small town USA. When my oldest daughters started high school, we lived in the suburbs outside of DC. They were both active in school sponsored activities.. Both were cheerleaders, poms, dance club, etc, etc. I knew who the jocks were, and also knew who the "party" crew were. Same group. Pot? Sure, as easy to get as beer. Parties? Every weekend. Jocks involved?? Hell yes, who do you think threw most of the parties?? When I moved back to this area, I had one daughter still in school (Junior) and my son was in elementary school. Same thing here. Jocks pretty much run the social circle around here, and have the biggest parties. My son was not into the whole "jock mentality". I thought organized sports would teach him teamwork and help him develop a competetive spirit. He played soccer for his junor and senior years. What did he learn?? That if you're a starter, the rules don't apply to you, as long as the coach likes you. He was kicked off the team for using profanity. Not directed to a referee, or player or coach. No, when his best friend came off the field for a rest after scoring a goal, he said to him "Nice f$%^n' shot" and gave him a high five. The coach started yelling at him, and threw him off the team right then and there, in front of the whole team!! Now, I'm not defending his language, but wait, it gets better. The star of the team ( the on who had scored the goal) came up to the coach and said "are you f#$%ing kidding??" If he's out, so am I. He refused to go back into the game. Did he get bounced for profanity? No. Did he get bounced for isubordination? No. So, Brian, what did you learn from this, my son?? Well Dad I learned that there are two sets of rules in this world. Rules for the successful and rules for the rest. Amen, my son. Class dismssed.

-- John D. in Pa. (mrmopar@penn.com), September 16, 2000.

I was never in team sports (I've never been the least bit athletic) but thought it would be good for the girls to be in 4-H, and then the oldest was interested in Civil Air Patrol (I think because her father used to be in it when he was growing up). You have to pick and choose your 4-H clubs -- some are good, the leaders have their heads on straight, and the parents are nice, sensible folks. Others, especially horse clubs, can be snobby and cliquish, with all kinds of squabbles going on. The CAP has good points, but will take over your life if you let it. I think the important thing is to get to know the people involved with whatever group your child is interested in and make sure they are the kind of people you want your child being influenced by. And stay involved yourself as much as possible. Young teens may resent what they see as "too much supervision" by their parents, but they don't yet have mature judgement, and can make serious mistakes that will affect the rest of their lives. You can give them a little freedom, but keep an eye on things and be prepared to rein them back in if necessary. My personal choice, if I had it to do over again, would be to, as much as possible, keep the children occupied with activities that we parents were also involved in. Right now, my husband is starting to get into historical reenacting, and I think this is something the girls would have found interesting when they were younger. We just recently got a used canoe and have been really enjoying our short expeditions in that -- if we'd had (two!) canoes years ago, and gone canoe camping, that would have been another good family activity. We did go camping and gold panning together, and for a while had horses. My point is just that there are a lot of things a family can do together that don't involve sending the children out on their own to be influenced by strangers who may not share your values for them. Yes, they do need some contact with other people, but you need to control the amount and type of contact until your child is ready to take on the world as an adult. Team sports may be good for building certain kinds of values, but families can be a team, too.

-- Kathleen Sanderson (stonycft@worldpath.net), September 16, 2000.

The best "team" activity to protect your kids from illegal/immoral behavior is to PRAY TOGETHER as a family. We also play family game night on Saturday nights. Nothing beats having a good relationship with your family and God.

-- Liz Rhein (merhein@shentel.net), September 17, 2000.

I think the biggest point to find in all this is that your kids need to be taught to think for themselves. This doesn't mean 'be different' for the sake of being different. I loathe the idea of team sports being glorified as they were and are. I played some, got cut some, and enjoyed some. But, most of all, I could see the difference in the people. There are some schools where hazing and cliches are encouraged by power. In other schools, kids are taught that what they have, they should share. In my experience, the latter is taught in schools where the parents teach this at home. In the former, what is taught in the schools (or allowed) is what is avoided at home. All of it comes down to being part of the world, and to do that you have to think. Many kids are only brought up to react and take. They grow to hate themselves and the world. It happens whether they are on a 'team' or not, whether rich or poor. Mostly, it happens when they are not taught to find their own purpose, but live by the purposes forced on them by peers, coaches, teachers, and inept counselors.

-- Dan (dan@invedyne.com), September 19, 2000.

I agree with Joel!!! That just might be worth repeating!!!

Combine the passing of kids who are the sports jocks with the building of our new school, more than 1/2 of the building fund went to building extra curricular buildings, including 2 basketball gyms and a track football field that rivals big city schools in Houston. Add on top of this all the coachs salaries, uniforms every year, and the real loosers are the kids who have coachs with just a degree in Kinesiology (used to be called physical education) teaching a myriad of classes from Math to Health! Though one of the boys in this years graduating class plays football and is also top 10, 3 of the other boys on our team are already set for four year full paid scholarships. Scholarships in football which will leave them on acedemic probabtion thier first semester and losing their scholarship in the end of the first grading period. We see this year after year in schools all over Texas. Bush is so proud of his school systems here, yes the kids who are tested pass the TASS tests here and can read, with flying colors. Just ask him though how many of the kids are exempt? They expempt you for learning diabilites, trouble makers, failure to follow directions, and any other reason that is plausable so the overall testings look good. Whoever does end up winning this ongoing Republican/Decocratic fight I just also wish for our country that the house and senate also are their majority also, so at least some of these bills for schools and health insurance will pass without all the pork attached. Imagine school vouchers in which we can choose to pay this money to whatever school we want for our own children instead of the closest one to them! And how about using it in a homeschooling cirriculum! Vicki

-- Vicki McGaugh (vickilonesomedoe@hotmail.com), September 20, 2000.

My High School was just that: HIGH (class of '69). The jocks were into jock-stuff: creating their own sports headlines, drinking, fast cars, and screwing cheerleaders. The alternative-types were into other things, mostly art stuff, hitchhiking (no cars), drug use, and screwing each other. From what I have seen at the one reunion that I attended though, I would say that the latter group (the ones who survived, anyway) have had the happier lives....they broke away from the norm, and learned alternative ways to think. Most of them gave up the drug part eons ago.

I think encouraging kids to PARTICIPATE, PERIOD(in positive life enhancing experiences) is important. But I got my values at home, early on, and from Sunday School, and that was way before being old enough to participate in sports. And I would think, not forcing your kids to do something that they truly don't want to do, would be the worst thing to do!..sports, piano lessons, or whatever. But whatever, is chosen, make sure they have a foundation at home first...then they should be able to make it through all those other challenges, distractions, and hazards, no matter how crazy!

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), September 20, 2000.

make that: FORCING your kids to something that they don't want to do...vacation brain...sorry

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), September 20, 2000.