******IMPORTANT NEWS FLASH*******

This Just In...

"Due to an anticipated voter turnout much larger than originally expected, the polling facilities may not be able to handle the load all at once. Therefore, Democrats are requested to vote on Tuesday, November 7, and Republicans and Thrid Party Voters on Wednesday, November 8.

Please pass this message along and help us to make sure that nobody gets left out." > > > > > > > > > > Vicki :)

-- Vicki McGaugh TX (vickilonesomedoe@hotmail.com), November 02, 2000

Answers

Yeah, Gore wishes. LOL

-- Green (ratdogs10@yahoo.com), November 02, 2000.

"Really Honey, I saw it on the net, so it must be true. I don't understand!" Nov. 8th, 2000 :-) JOhn

-- John in S. IN (jsmengel@hotmail.com), November 02, 2000.

Vicki, this actually made NPR news, folks are really believing it! Makes me wonder..... Annie in SE OH.

-- Annie Miller (annie@1st.net), November 02, 2000.

Based on how incredibly gullible and yes, stupid, some of the voters are this year, it doesn't surprize me at all that some would believe such a concoction. Honestly. Can't anyone think anymore? I am really losing heart, here, folks.........................

-- sheepish (rborgo@gte.net), November 02, 2000.

Well I guess Gore gets to make the rules. After all he invented voting.

-- paul (p@ledgewood-consulting.com), November 02, 2000.

Sorry, I have already voted via absentee ballot as I refuse to stand in line for almost anything.

-- Sandy (smd2@netzero.net), November 02, 2000.

Doesn't matter to me. I first registered in Missouri as a Democrat, but I will be voting for Bush.

-- Notforprint (Not@thekeyboard.com), November 02, 2000.

I got that a couple weeks ago only it said Republicans were to vote on the 7th, I liked it that way better!:-)

-- Lenore (archambo@winco.net), November 02, 2000.

This really does make sense. Since the republicans were involved in so many witch hunts over halloween they will be far too tired to get to the polls until the 8th

-- Nick (wildheart@ekyol.com), November 02, 2000.

Yes Lenore, I switched it! :)

-- Vicki McGaugh TX (vickilonesomedoe@hotmail.com), November 02, 2000.

THE AL GORE STORY Good afternoon all. I'm Al Gore, and I'd like to tell you a little about myself. I know a lot about hardship, because I came into this world as a poor black child in a tiny town in the backwoods of Tennessee. I was born in a log cabin that I built with my own hands. I taught myself to read by candlelight and helped support my 16 brothers and sisters by working summers as a deck hand on a Mississippi River steamboat. Frequently we would stop the ship and I would cut and split five cords of wood for fuel overnight for the steam engines. My mother taught me the value of education, so every day, I would walk 5 miles to a one-room schoolhouse. I was a mischievous, fun

loving scamp, though I never dreamed that one day, my youthful escapades would serve as the inspiration for "Huckleberry Finn." Back then, we Jewish black folks in the south were second-class citizens. One day,

a traveling minister came through town, and I asked him if anyone was ever going

to do something to guarantee civil rights for all Americans.

Well, I guess I made an impression. You see, the minister's name was Martin Luther

King, Jr. My father was a United States Senator. He once perched me on his knee and

said, "Son, if you work hard and listen to your mama, someday you can live in a hotel

in Washington, D.C., and go to an exclusive prep school." As a young Hindu boy, these

were very valuable lessons. But life of privilege was not for me. Being Chinese,

after getting my high school diploma, I took a job in a hot, dirty textile mill. I was so

appalled at the treatment of the workers there that I organized a union.

Later, that experience inspired a movie - which is why, to this day, my close friends

at the AFL-CIO call me "Norma Rae." When word got out what an 18 year old factory

worker had done, Harvard University called and offered me a scholarship. I captained

the hockey team to four consecutive national championships, but I also played football

and was good enough to win the Heisman Trophy. During my college years, I lived in

a housing project and moonlighted writing songs and playing lead guitar for a little rock

band. You may have heard of us - The Rolling Stones. I'm the one with the lips.

But there was a war going on, and I felt I had to serve my country. So I enlisted in the

U. S. Army and went to Vietnam. I was deeply opposed to the war, but I did my duty

as a soldier and came back home with the Medal of Honor and the Croix de Guerre.

My battlefield expertise is current requisite reading material for Officers Candidates

to this very day. My being a wounded female officer serving in disguise as a journalist

was a full time project, but my military knowledge helped save tens of thousands of

lives. Many cities in Southeast Asia are named after me to this very day.

Statues of me are still commonplace in many official Government buildings in

Viet Nam. When I got back, I took a long journey across this great land of ours.

I've crossed the deserts bare, man, I've breathed the mountain air, man, I've traveled,

I've done my share, man, I've been everywhere. I've hunted all the dangerous species of big

game in five continents using only a handmade spear or my handmade lasersighted compound

bow. And the people I met at truckstops and campgrounds and homeless shelters on that

journey all said the same thing: "Al, we need you in Washington." I knew they were right,

but first I had to take care of some other business---building the World Trade Center,

finding a low cost, more reliable nuclear weapon trigger design, founding the Audubon

Society, doing the clinical research that proved smoking caused cancer, and coming up with

the recipe for Mrs. Field's chocolate chip cookies. I was, in fact, the third (still silent)

partner of Ben & Jerry with over half of the flavors personally developed by Tipper and me

in our own kitchen. My extensive knowledge of Arctic Sea life keeps me busy in the research

laboratory, but those endangered species need love too!

Translating the dead sea scrolls is one of my favorite hobbies, and my current volume is in

print in over 73 languages and is being studied in Seminaries worldwide. Being Indian,

both Native American and the Mid East kind, this is valuable experience for me. Have towel

and Tee Pee, will travel. Finally, I deferred to the demands of the people of Tennessee and

allowed them to elect me to the House of Representatives and the Senate.

And then one winter day nearly nine years ago, for no particular reason, I answered the call

of the people once again and took the oath of office as Vice President of the United States.

I also invented the Internet. Since then, I've been part of the most successful administration

in American history. My friend, Bill Gates has asked me many times why I gave him the

ideas of software development and asked for no money. Gosh, it just wouldn't be right!

Many times President Bill Clinton has been pondering some grave decision and has asked

me what to do. And when I would give him my thoughts, he would invariable say,

"Of course. That's brilliant. Why didn't I think of that?"

During the darkest days of the impeachment battles, the President told me he only wished

he had listened when I told him to stay away from that dark-haired intern with the big

hooters. So after I decided to run for president, I sat down with him and asked if he had

any suggestions about how to conduct my campaign. And Bill Clinton gave me a few simple

words of advice-words I'll never forget. He looked me in the eye and he said, "Al, just tell

the truth, it's always worked well for me." Thanks, I'm Al Gore and I want to be your next President. You can trust and believe me.

-- Terri Miller (tchr4hm@juno.com), November 02, 2000.

Thanks for the laugh!

-- Jay Blair (jayblair678@yahoo.com), November 03, 2000.

I could not believe that this actually got onto the local news (twice!) as a "hoax". I thought it was a joke, not a hoax. A hoax is an attempt to get people to believe something untrue for you own benefit. The idea that anyone would believe this is ludicrous, but appearently true. In my opinion, anyone who would be dumb enough to fall for such an obvious piece of fictional fun should be allowed to do so. No one that demented, stupid, or gullible should have the priviledge of assisting in the direct formation of any govt.!!! LOL

-- Soni (thomkilroy@hotmail.com), November 04, 2000.