Sorry to do this to you all, but....

Gutless, talentless first team. Ditto the reserves. Ditto the under 19's. Terrible atmosphere at SJP. Gloating Mackems heading for europe. Mad Doug embarrassing us in the national press again. Shareprice heading south daily. Dyer knackered. Ditto Shearer. Bobby Lee past it. Bassedas + Marcelino + Lua lua + Gavilan = 15 Mill down the pan. Domi and Goma say our training set-up is prehistoric. No clean sheets for 25 games. Robby Bobson losing the plot.

Have I forgotten anything?

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001

Answers

Well DSS, you thankfully omitted to mention to the "R" word, but other than that.....let me see.....no, that just about covers it. ;-{(

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001

Just checked - the share price is up from 34p to 35.5p.
Hallelujah Douggie baby, it's working!! Our luck has changed: Europe here we come!

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001

Thankyou for your application for the role of "Club Spin Doctor" DSS. Unfortunately, we are unable to consider you for the position at this time. We shall keep your letter on file.

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001

the share price is up from 34p to 35.5p.

Wow! Can we play Middlesbro every week? Hang on - shome mishtake surely>?

Quite remarkable considering the carnage in the City at the moment. I wonder if some teenage scribblers in the Square Mile have stumbled across the Footie & Mouth piece, believed it be accurate, and piled in accordingly?

Another possibility - what were the management doing in London yesterday? It was considered unusual that Al was there. Sponsorship deal? Let's hope the share move is good news anyway and not just the bounce of a dead cat.

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001

frankly, I imagine they can and will get much worse.

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001

I'm off to the cash and carry to by a stack or razor blades to flog in my shop.

You doom merchants better be right or i'll be out of pocket.

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001

Rik, you might want to set up a stand on the Tyne Bridge. Folks may want to slash their wrists while jumping....just to be sure. ;-)

-- Anonymous, March 21, 2001