Although I was baptized Catholic, I haven't been involved in the Church in almost 20 years. Fourteen years ago I married a Lutheran man in a Lutheran ceremony. We had once child. We divorced after his proclamation that he didn't love me, never had, and simply married me because he missed his mother. Seven years later I married a Methodist. A Greek Orthodox minister married us at home. We have one child and currently in the process of divorce.

At the same time I have realized that I have a responsibility to my children in that they need to be part of an organized religion. I would like to establish a relationship with the Catholic church, but can I do that based on this history? To reenter the Church, do I need an annulment on the first marriage? I assume the church doesn't even consider my second marriage valid, due to the fact that the first marriage was not annuled.

I'd appreciate any information.

Thank you,

L. Harvey

-- L. Harvey (masrica2@hotmail.com), June 13, 2001

Answers

An Annulment is not necessary unless you place to attempt marriage again.

-- Br. Rich SFO (repsfo@prodigy.net), June 13, 2001.

Sorry about that that should have been plan not place. That's what happens when I try to do three things at once! lol.

-- Br. Rich SFO (repsfo@prodigy.net), June 13, 2001.

Dear L. Harvey--
You don't have to re-enter the catholic Church. You are already a Catholic for life, even if you haven't been a serious Catholic.

I have a sister who is divorced and remarried, outside the Church. I say re-married. She is not outside the Church. In fact she has brought her second husband into the Church; he was once a non-practicing Protestant!

She devoutly believes everything the Church teaches. She tried to get the anullment of her first marriage, but the first husband refused to co-operate with the court. He has since disappeared. Maybe soon she'll re-apply for a decree. In the past, it wasn't very easy to get one. They say it's much better these days?

She and her husband attend holy Mass every sunday and holy day. They pray, they make a spiritual communion each Mass, without receiving the actual Sacrament. They are members insofar as possible, within this limited circumstance. In my own heart, I could never judge them as adulterers, since they're legally married.

You can also be accepted back. It's only as far as the reception of Communion you'd be left out. As I said, the opportunity to adore the Blessed Sacrament, and make a spiritual communion is denied NO ONE. Come back; don't delay. Bring the man you've married as well. Have faith in Jesus, who has you in His divine care; He's never left you. You left Him. God be with you always; I'll also pray for you.

-- euguene c. chavez (chavezec@pacbell.net), June 14, 2001.

Jmj

Dear L. Harvey,
It is true that can return to "full communion" with the Catholic Church, receiving the Sacraments of Penance and Holy Eucharist immediately, if you are not living with a man.

And you may ignore the whole "decree of nullity" process if you intend never to marry in the future.

But if you do hope to marry, you should discuss that right away with your Catholic pastor. The process will be short or possibly longer, depending on a key circumstance that you did not describe to us.

You stated that you "haven't been involved in the Church in almost 20 years." But did you ever formally declare that you were no longer Catholic, either orally, in writing, or by joining a congregation of another Christian body?
If not, then you never ceased being a Catholic, making your first marriage patently invalid and easily declared so.
But if you did formally break with Catholicism, then a nullity process (if you ask for it) will take longer.

Welcome back to the Catholic family! May God be with you. Vaya con Dios, "mas rica."

John

-- (jgecik@desc.dla.mil), July 04, 2001.

Jmj

Dear friend Eugene,
Happy Fourth of July! Get on the phone to your sister tonight, I beg you. This should not be delayed even one day.

You wrote [and why did you not tell us of this sooner?]: "She tried to get the anullment of her first marriage, but the first husband refused to co-operate with the court. He has since disappeared. Maybe soon she'll re-apply for a decree. In the past, it wasn't very easy to get one."

The complete absence of a spouse and/or his lack of co-operation does not stand in the way of a marriage tribunal carrying out its work. (Perhaps one or both of those things presented an insurmountable obstacle many years ago [before Vatican II, or maybe even before the new Code of Canon Law in 1983], but such is not true today.)

It would be truly wrong -- and a great tragedy -- for a Catholic to continue to absent herself from the Sacraments when the merciful Lord is extending a hand to her today to make her situation "regular."
It is not within your ability or mine to judge your sister as innocent of adultery. She accepts, in a docile way, the Church's judgment that, objectively speaking, she is not innocent. Now it is time for her to do all she can to work with the tribunal to show objectively that she really is innocent. Please encourage her to pursue the decree of nullity tomorrow morning, so that she and you can receive Holy Communion together. I have read, more than once, that a person who is not in the state of sanctifying grace cannot make an efficacious spiritual communion. That is, God bestows only actual graces, to lead to the Sacrament of Penance, upon a person who is not in sanctifying grace. So much more is the reason for your sister to act without delay.

God bless you.
John

-- (jgecik@desc.dla.mil), July 04, 2001.