love that Texas heat! :) : LUSENET : Freedom! self reliance : One Thread

My sister-in-law sent me this; thought ya'll might enjoy it:

> SUMMER IN TEXAS You know you're in Texas.....when... > You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water. > You can say 110 degrees without fainting. > You can make instant sun tea. > You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron. > The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly... > You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car. > You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window. > You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance. > Hot water now comes out of both taps. > It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, & not one person is out on the streets. > You actually burn your hand opening the car door... > You break a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. before work. > No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning... > Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" > You realize that asphalt has a liquid state. > IT'S SO HOT IN TEXAS THAT... > The birds have to use pot holders to pull worms out of the ground. > The potatoes cook underground, and all you have to do to have lunch is to pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper. > Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying hard boiled eggs. > IT'S SO DRY IN TEXAS THAT... > The cows are giving evaporated milk. > The trees are whistlin' for the dogs. > A sad Texan once prayed, "I wish it would rain -not so much for me, cuz I've seen it - but for my 7-year-old." > A visitor to Texas once asked, "Does it ever rain out here?" A rancher quickly answered "Yes, it does. Do you remember that part in the Bible where it rained for 40 days and 40 nights?" The visitor replied, "Yes, I'm familiar with Noah's flood." "Well," the rancher puffed up, we got 'bout two and a half inches of that. >

-- mary (, August 09, 2001


LOL..when I lived in Keller, Texas for three years, my friends back East asked me what the heat was like. This is what i told them: On May first, put your oven on 500 degrees and lay your head inside the door with a fan blowing on you from the counter..keep your head inside the oven door until mid-September..occasionally have a friend spray your head with water, and once in a great while, turn the fan off. In the evenings during May and August, you may turn the thermostat down to 450......

-- lesley (, August 09, 2001.

Y'all got that right! I grew up in Tejas, and worked as a carpenter for one summer. Drove a car out to San Francisco for my sister, in 1965. The weather, in August, was (very) cool, breezy, and foggy. Jacket type wether. I figured I could work my ass off there without breaking a sweat.

Moved to northern Calif. Been back two or three times. It always makes me happy to see where I don't live anymore.

JOJ, who hates sticky weather....

-- jumpoff joe (, August 09, 2001.

Definitely a fair assessment! I never truly appreciated air conditioning until I lived here for a few years. I really liked the 7 year old comment!

-- Doreen (, August 09, 2001.

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