Have you ever taken part in a world-record setting event?

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2001

Answers

(Mendelson claims that refrigerators should be cleaned weekly)

Yeah, this one is mine. (not the cleaning part) I think the record I'm going for has something to do with not cleaning the fridge.

I swear everything is covered.

(please don't mention shocking news unless you're going to at least give a tiny hint -- that's just mean)

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2001

Just the other day, I was at Kris' house, brushing my teeth after a sugary meal. Since we had all shared the same food, Brian and Kris were in there too, maintaining dental hygiene. "Wow," I observed, "three people in the same place brushing their teeth at the same time! We must be setting some kind of 'group brushing' world record! Ha Ha!" But then you came along and ruined it.

-- Anonymous, August 14, 2001

I used to live near one of the big balls of string. Not twine, but string. And it wasn't even the biggest. Not by far. But it was there, sitting in this little house with windows and you could peek in at it- my particular hometown's largest ball of string- it was rather sad, if you think about it. I mean, all that string! For no real purpose!

-- Anonymous, August 15, 2001

re: shocking news

So... you're saying then that Sara is pregnant? Wow.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001

Yes, Sara is pregnant. With quintuplets. And Elvis is the father!

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001

That is shocking. I didn't know she even knew Mr. Costello.

-- Anonymous, August 16, 2001