I don't usually share tips from my broker, but I thought this too hot not to relay to my friends.

If you have any of the following stocks, you may want to review. American Can Co. Interstate Water.Co. National Gas Co. Northern Tissue Co.

Due to uncertain market conditions, at this time we advise you to sit on your American Can, hold your Water and let go of your Gas. You may be interested to know that Northern Tissue touched a new bottom today and millions were wiped clean.

-- Anonymous, October 10, 2001

Answers

MY FATHER is an avid fan of a nearby university's football team. During a recent season, his team got off to a poor start, and almost every Saturday afternoon Dad sat ranting at the TV screen. One day, after loud shouts of disgust, silence fell. Puzzled, my mother went into the living room to find him quietly watching a World War II movie. "I just switched over to something that I knew we would win!" Dad explained. -- Contributed to Reader's Digest "Life In These United States" by Sandra Culp

-- Anonymous, October 10, 2001

Can't wait to see what your 7 PM humor is like!

-- Anonymous, October 10, 2001

Speaking of football, SAR01, Iowa State has had its ups and downs over the years. Some years ago the football coach was being compared to Billy Graham, insofar as both men had to ability to get 50,000 people to rise out of their seats and shout "Jesus Christ!"

-- Anonymous, October 10, 2001

heheheheheh...this is stuff DH sends home from work!!!! 11:30pm

-- Anonymous, October 10, 2001