The senility prayer(humor)

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Found this on another board and thot it was funny.

The Senility Prayer

God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to run into the ones that I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered:

1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.

3. I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

5. All reports are in, life is now officially unfair.

6. If all is not lost, where is it?

7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

8. Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant.

9. I wish the buck stopped here, I sure could use a few...

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

13. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

15. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

16. It's not hard to meet expenses ... they're everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm there after.

-- john (natlivent@pcpros.net), November 15, 2001

Answers

You should be ashamed of yourself mocking a prayer to the Lord. I ask the moderator to delete your drivel.

-- Annie Miller in SE OH (annie@1st.net), November 16, 2001.

Annie, you don't think the Lord has a sence of humor?? Well look around.

John, I found your 'prayer' to be right on the money. I know because God has allowed me to be around for 62 years. Life IS funny unless you take it DEAD serious. God don't care which. He just wants you to love him. I choose to do it with a smile on my face and I think He has one too.

-- Belle (gardenbelle@terraworld.net), November 16, 2001.


Whatever makes anyone think John is mocking the Lord? At my age, I've either experienced or witnessed most of what's on the list. Besides, I think God must have a sense of humor. Just look in the mirror.

-- Ed (ecpubs@lynchburg.net), November 16, 2001.

I am close to positive that Annie did not make that remark. It is not like her at all. I think whoever is mad at her is doing this. IMHO (now Annie if you are having a bad day and are really making all these crappy remarks just don't tell anyone ;>) )

-- diane (gardiacaprines@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.

Ummmmm........lighten up guys.......Annie is most likely kidding......trying to make a point about certain very uptight people on this forum..........good grief

-- Earthmama (earthmama@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.


EM, you are missing something dear. Annie would have left a smile or a wink. Ken has elimated a whole bunch of responses and posts made on Annie's behalf.........just didn't get to this one.

-- diane (gardiacaprines@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.

EM, don't be so open-minded that your brains fall out.

-- nope (not@now.com), November 16, 2001.

Diane, I completely agree with you. I had to go out to do some chores, but couldn't get over the fact that this is NOT ANNIE. I was so pleased to see that Ken was on top of it and just missed this thread. What a pain, along with all that we all have to do (Ken as well) and then he has to be the playground supervisor for this forum. I would be interestsed in the average age of homesteader's. My impression is that a good number are over 40. When do some people grow up???? Thanks for coming to her defense. Mary

-- Mary (Mary@home.com), November 16, 2001.

WEll now, I sure don't know if Annie posted this or not, but I took it as a joke, and laughed. I figure probably the only one who has the right to comment is Annie herself, if indeed she chooses to be offended by it.

Anywho, to "nope", I love your warning about my brains falling out! LOL.... I'm sure it's very good advice...I'll have to remember that one! :)

-- Earthmama (earthmama@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.


Annie............PLEASE comment.........just once I would like to have done the right thing in EM's eyes. It gets so old always having to give in and be wrong.

-- diane (gardiacaprines@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.


I too just thought that it was Annie just being sarcastic and making a joke. But since then I've seen her comment about this topic on the troll-free forum and she didn't mention anything about seeing it here, so I'm not so sure. I didn't see any of the other posts that Ken had to delete so it didn't occur to me that someone else was posting using her name.

-- Sherri C (CeltiaSkye@aol.com), November 16, 2001.

Oh dear sweet Diane, you never do anything 'not right' in my eyes, you silly! You are one of my favorite people, and I know what you do always comes from love. Relax........let's be happy here, ok? :)

-- Earthmama (earthmama@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.

Annie, I opened the forum up with coffee this morning and there were a multitude of answers attributed to you, plus a couple of kind of raunchy threads started in your name. If you would like to know what was deleted you can e-mail me privately. I really did think I was doing the right thing in defending you. This was number six and I thought it was iffy so I commented. Sherri and EM......they, the other posts, were so unlike Annie. I have never known her to be just plain rude; even when we disagreed on stuff. I am happy, but sad that the stinking trolls keep destroying forums one by one so that they have to go passworded. I think this one is too big to, and Dave and Ken are not so inclined anyway. The two news forums that went passworded this week have been attacked in the same way. People using other peoples identities.

-- diane (gardiacaprines@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.

I didn't know anything about " a multitude of answers attributed to" Annie! I can see where we would have different perspectives here! That changes it considerably. Wow.....if somebody did that, what a dope.

-- Earthmama (earthmama@yahoo.com), November 16, 2001.

Don't delete that fake Annie post, Ken, it might be your only way to trace back to the perpetrator. I sent you an email with some suggestions, which I hope help you.

-- Joy F [in So. Wisconsin] (CatFlunky@excite.com), November 16, 2001.


The first response WAS NOT ME, but some troll taking infantile revenge for me telling him/her that he/she was a spineless fool who enjoys making other folks lives more "challenging/interesting", all without the cujones of using a real e-mail addy!!!

Thanks to all who alerted my privately to the prankster's unwelcome attentions.

-- Annie Miller in SE OH (annie@1st.net), November 17, 2001.


I am confused Annie, how can someone use your e-mail addy when posting if its not you? I would suspect that if i were to e-mail you privately at the address of the first reply that it would come back to you via you e-mail addy. So if thats the case then aren't you receiving a lot of e-mails from the forum to your e-mail addy despite the fact you didn't make those posts?

I am so appalled by the fake supposed fake post you made that I am offended. This doesn't make sense, we need to find the insolant individual and then chew them up and spit them out. I am still lost about the other posts and asked on another thread about the fake posters as i was gone for a week and missed the mess. Hope you get this figured out soon. this must be so hard for you.

-- Bernice (geminigoats@yahoo.com), November 17, 2001.


Bernice, you can block being notified of e-mail responses on the answer the question page that comes up when you reply, just click on it.

I did get several e-mails from kind folks who alerted me to what was going on here on the forum, and then came and posted here to that effect.

You can type in ANY COOKIE you want in that space provided, lusenet does not check or require genuine addy or cookie addresses to contribute here.

-- Annie Miller in SE OH (annie@1st.net), November 19, 2001.


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