The senility prayer

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Ya'll probably saw this on CS but if not:

Found this on another board and thot it was funny.

The Senility Prayer

God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to run into the ones that I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered:

1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.

3. I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded...

5. All reports are in, life is now officially unfair.

6. If all is not lost, where is it?

7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

8. Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant.

9. I wish the buck stopped here, I sure could use a few...

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

13. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

15. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

16. It's not hard to meet expenses ... they're everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter... I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm there after.

-- Anonymous, November 15, 2001

Answers

Cute and appropriate John, more appropriate with each passing year :- )!!! Thanks, I needed a good laugh!

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001

Hey John, who told you it was my birthday today? :)

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001

Sherri.........is it really your birthday today???? If so HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Wish I could do the graphic stuff to send you a cake. :>)

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001

Yes, Warner Brothers was jealous of the world-wide media frenzy surrounding my 38th birthday, so they decided to release a movie today about some sort of magician kid in order to steal my publicity. Has anybody ever heard of this Harry Putter or whatever the heck his name is? hehehehehe

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001

I am so embarrassed to admit this, but we are going to see the little Harry guy this afternoon as soon as it opens, First time ever did that I believe. Bren and Ali bought pre-tickets online even; now if Lotus was here we would probably have the guts to go in costume, but she's out of town. (I AM considering wearing her cool purple cape though.....and she DOES have one of those pointy hats.........)

Happy Birthday, Sherri!

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001



John, I love those and wouldn't even begin to tell you how many apply to me and mine. Another one I like, is "I've got all the money I'll ever need. Unless I buy something."

Enjoy

Wildman, AR

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001


Happy Birthday, Sherri! Scorpio, eh? No stinging!

I named my cat Harry -- never thought about the Harry Potter craze. My Harry is named for Harry Longabough, aka The Sundance Kid, or in kitty's case, The Sundance Kit! I'll probably see the movie eventually, but I am not going to fight the big crowds to do it. I'll wait -- maybe til after Christmas if its the blockbuster they seem to think it's going to be.

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001


Actually, I wanted her to name the cat Bigfoot -- his feet were HUGE when we first saw him (he's sort of grown into them). Joy had the same problem with her previous cat, Hamlet, who got the name shortly before the Mel Gibson movie made a big splash. In reality, he was named for the way he walked around the farm, 'emoting' at the top of his lungs about everything that was WRONG (mainly that his food dish was empty).

Happy birthday Sherri!!

-- Anonymous, November 16, 2001


Happy Birthday one day late Sherrie! Oh, gee, looks like I was born senile.--The last senility fits me perfectly.

-- Anonymous, November 17, 2001

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