I have recently met a male friend who was a victim of wife abuse,he was constantly slapped ,kicked and went through a period of her throwing things at him that hurt him, she actually ran her snow machine off a porch and on to the hood of his truck as he tried to leave, when the police were called he was arrested because she lied and said he was beating her,after a reconsilation and him trying to make it work because he loved her, she then lied to him about going away for the weekend , he and his 22 year old son drove to where she said she would be and seen her with her ex husband. Hurt and I can assume extremley shocked at what he saw, he gave her the finger and as he was driving away then it became her and the ex's word against his as she tried to run him off the road. The police were called as he tried to drive home and it ended in his arrest and the officer's never listened to his son's side of the story, so he was sent to jail for 72 days with a restrining order placed against him for 7 years and one year probation. He was directed to attend a Anger Management class at his expense for actions brought on by her,he is very depressed and very hurt with no where to turn and no one to believe his side of the story, I am appauled at the way the Alaska court systems do not want the truth, especially when there are eye wittnesses, they just ignor or have no sympathy for an abused man. She also accused him of threatening to kill her in court. My question is how does a man defend himself against such acts? Where can I direct him to seek help? I am at a loss for helping him as to where to turn. Help!!!

-- Anonymous, January 04, 2002

Answers

I would be interested to know what sort of responses you recieved to this post. This is a topic that is so taboo that I can barely find any references on the internet. I have read very credible studies that indicate that this is not unusual, yet so many in the spouse abuse "industry" refuse to acknowledge its existance. Now with mandatory report and conviction laws in most states, prosecutors have no need to investigate, or even solicit the cooperation of the alleged victim.

-- Anonymous, August 04, 2002