I have been thinking a lot lately about appreciating your spouse.

Sometimes it seems like we do the same old chores over and over, dishes, laundry, cleaning, taking care of animals, on and on. My husband works, and builds the fires and carries wood. Sometimes we get so stuck in this every day rut, that not only do we not feel appreciated, we also don't appreciate each other.

I guess my point is that we should try to let our spouses know once in a while that we do appreciate the every day things they do for us.

Men especially sometimes have a hard time talking, but show their love on other ways. When I look outside and see that Cale has cleaned the snow off the van, and shoveled a path to the barn for me, I know that is his way of showing he cares about me. I don't want to take these little things for granted, but show him that I notice and appreciate these things he does!

so to bring a little brightness into your day, look around and see what your spouse does for you, and say "thank you!"

-- Melissa (me@home.net), January 11, 2002

Answers

What I appreciate most about Gary is his hard work and the way he cheers me up when I'm down.

-- Cindy (SE. IN) (atilrthehony@hotmail.com), January 11, 2002.

Even after 8 years, I still tell Joe that he's too good to be true.

There are times that I try to do one of his usual "chores" so he doesn't have to, thinking that I'm doing him a favor, But he really likes to do them and he says that he doesn't want to have me do more than I need to do. What a team! I think I'll keep him:)

-- Charleen in WNY (harperhill@eznet.net), January 11, 2002.

One of the things that has kept our marriage going is that we laugh together a lot! That man's sense of humor can just about make me laugh until I have tears in my eyes. I guess I do the same to him. Right out of nowhere, he can make a comment that is so funny and so ridiculous that I am lost in laughter for awhile.

-- Ardie /WI (ardie54965@hotmail.com), January 11, 2002.

My husband is funny too, He is gentle with the cats--this means a lot to me. He helps out around the house equally. He is a wonderful nurse on the rare occasions I get sick. He knows me better than anyone.

I told him yesterday that he was the best thing that ever happened to me...and I meant it.

-- Cat (catcrazy@somewhere.com), January 11, 2002.

Hubby & I have been together as a couple 25 years this Feb /we will be married 25 years this June---

Our marriage has gotten better over the years-- I guess we finally have each other trained!!! ha!

I appreciate the "little things"--- he still opens my car door for me /most of the time---he still has "that look" /when I walk into a room--- He raised my daughter from a previous marriage as ours----he adores the grandchildren--

he likes the animals & we enjoy them together----

We are finally on the same page(in life) most of the time now----

He was never shown affection while growing up-----so I still walk up to him & say, "I came over for you /to be able to hug me" "Or Do you have any kisses for me--I came to check & see????"

He is so comfortable to be with!!!!!!!!!! I cherrish our relationship! And most of all I appreciate him being the spiritual leader of our family!!!!!!!!

-- Sonda (sgbruce@birch.net), January 11, 2002.

Seems humor makes for a healthy marriage! My husband of 27 years makes me laugh too and that always makes me feel good. I guess I tend to get too serious sometimes. I thank God for him every day. We really should be thankful for what our spouses do. Valentines' day is coming up soon. Let's make him a really special goody? Any ideas? I used to make a heart cake. Bake a 8" round cake and a 8" rectangular cake. Place the rectangular cake on a platter or as I do a piece of cardboard covered with foil at an angle. Cut the round layer in half and put one half at the top of the angled square to make a heart and frost. It's easy and looks nice. Any other ideas? Since my husband and I are both on diets, I could use another less fattening idea!!!

-- Barb in Ky. (bjconthefarm@yahoo.com), January 11, 2002.

Barb, well, and everyone else too. I have a book called Baking Without Fat by George Mateljan which is just fabulous. I mean desserts like you wouldn't believe, cheesecakes and everything that are non fat. The big trick with many of them is you use yogurt cheese rather than cream cheese, which anyone can make, it's just Dannon Plaint Non Fat Yogurt that you drain most of the whey off. Anyway, our favorite recipe in the book is the Spicy Pumpkin Cheesecake. It does require real maple syrup though, which a lot of folks don't have on hand. I highly recommend this book to everyone. Some other dishes just to whet your appetites (remember, no fat in these at all): Boston Cream Cake, Brownies, Carrot Cake, Coco Banana Merinque, Lemon Cream Cake......

-- Katie (homesteader@accessnevada.com), January 11, 2002.

Thanks Katie! sounds yummy, I'll look for the book. I think I might try to fix a "cheese cake" with lemon jello and the yogurt cheese you mentioned.

-- Barb in Ky. (bjconthefarm@yahoo.com), January 11, 2002.

Someone else mentioned using jello over a cake. You could make a low- fat white cake with red jello and lite whipped cream over it. I'm sure there are many ways you can vary this according to your won taste and needs.

-- Melissa (me@home.net), January 11, 2002.

Been married for 54 years, My husband Tom,and myself came out of the depression, tom served in world war two, On a battle ship. And also in the korean war. We lived in quansit huts, on Naval bases, Lived in one by railroad tracks and the bed would roll across the floor when trains went by, We laughed and cried together. When ever we had a fight, We never took it to bed with us. He is old now, and frail, scares me a lot. Irene

-- Irene texas (tkorsborn@cs.com), January 11, 2002.

I tend to whine alot about my hubby not saying the "L---" word, or not hugging enough, but when it comes down to it , he's always there. the week after christmas, I came down sick with the flu, Hubby was on vacation and spent the whole week taking care of me. Or when i was sick with my head in the toilet, he would come in and hold my hair out of the way.He works all day on the farm, then goes to his night job and works 10 hours there. He takes such good care of the three kids and I.

-- Sherry (Calfarm@msn.com), January 11, 2002.

Aw shucks. Seriously I am uncomfortable with emotions. Have you ever seen the movie Princess Bride. In it the character says as you wish and one day she realizes that he cares. I figure 10 years after I'm dead she will realize.

-- Tom (Calfarm@msn.com), January 12, 2002.

Yeah, I have a really great wife named Yvette. She takes care of my son and myself before taking care of herself, always. I love her beyond all reason.

-- j.r. guerra (jrguerra@boultinghousesimpson.com), January 14, 2002.