Some humor from my e-mail:

Here's a list of all variations of the "God Speaks" billboards. The billboards are a simple black background with white text. No fine print or sponsoring organization is included. These are awesome...enjoy.

* Tell the kids I love them -God

* Let's meet at my house Sunday before the game. -God

* C'mon over and bring the kids. -God

* What part of "Thou Shalt Not..." didn't you understand? -God

* We need to talk. -God

* Keep using my name in vain, I'll make rush hour longer. -God

* Loved the wedding, now invite me into the marriage. -God

* That "Love Thy Neighbor" thing... I meant it. -God

* I love you and you and you and you and... -God

*Will the road you're on get you to my place? -God

*Follow me. -God

* Big bang theory?... You've got to be kidding!!! -God

* My way is the highway. -God

* Need directions? -God

* Have you read my #1 best seller? There'll be a test. -God

* Do you have any idea where you're going? -God

* Don't make me come down there!!! -God

-- Melissa in SE Ohio (me@home.net), February 10, 2002

Answers

The marquee in front of one of our local churches has some really cute sayings sometimes, and one not too long ago read "Are you my child?" and sited a bible verse. My hubby and I decided it really should have read, "Who's your daddy?"

Hope that didn't offend anyone - we just thought it was funny!

-- Cheryl in KS (cherylmccoy@rocketmail.com), February 10, 2002.

Hello Melissa,

There was a movie some time ago...a comedy I think by Mel Brooks. It showed Moses coming down from the mountain with an arm full of clay tablets. He stood on a ledge just above his people and called to their attention. As he was telling them that God had given him the tablets He dropped one and it shattered at his feet. He said, "I have been to the mountain top and talked with God! He has given us, TWENTY......OOPS!....I mean TEN COMMANDMENTS!"

Sincerely,

Ernest

-- http://communities.msn.com/livingoffthelandintheozarks (espresso42@hotmail.com), February 10, 2002.

Funny Ernest, since so many have such a hard time keeping track of just the basic ten, that may have been a good thing???!!!!

-- Melissa in SE Ohio (me@home.net), February 10, 2002.