It's a JOKE!!!!!!!! : LUSENET : Freedom! self reliance : One Thread

Maybe we can get a chuckle out of this?

Fat Theology

And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetable of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?"

And Man said, "Super size them." And Man gained pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her figure that man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth chocolate. And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."

And Satan brought forth ice cream. And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "I have sent your heart healthy vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.

And Man gained pounds and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

And God brought forth running shoes and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds.

And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2.

And Man gained pounds.

And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil."

And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip also.

And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in cholesterol.

And Satan saw and said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.

And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery. And Satan created HMOs.

-- Doreen (, February 11, 2002


Funny, except for the last sentance. That one seems pretty true to me.

-- StevenB (thicketyrowfarm@earthlink.nett), February 11, 2002.

I represent that remark. dale

-- dale (, February 11, 2002.

I cant STAND olive oil,, hate the smell and taste of that crap

-- blah (, February 12, 2002.

Please note the above post is not mine. On my forum I have had someone using a variation of my hotmail address to sometimes make negative remarks, but there I am able to delete them. So it looks like they have moved here to play these tricks! If you see something that is inherently negative, it probably isn't me, as that is not my normal style. Most of you who frequent Country Families will realize that I hope.

Funny joke! God gave us just what we need, if only we had the strength to stick with it!!!

-- Melissa in SE Ohio (, February 12, 2002.

Moderation questions? read the FAQ