The current issue of Weekly World News has broken the story that the Al Qaedas (who hate the pint-sizes hero worse than anyone, for reasons given below) have paid South American banditos a huge sum to capture BatBoy, which they have done with tranquilizer darts. BatBoy is now a captive somewhere in the world, going on trial for his life, and facing a 380 charge indictment for war crimes.

"He will be given a fair trial, and then executed" according to a terrorist press release.

Now I suspect that BatBoy will not stay a captive for long. I would bet that in the next week or two, WWN will be reporting his escape. All I can say is that he had better escape. The 380 charges in the indictment include: urinating in 87 Al Qaeda caves, making them uninhabitable, and mooning bin Laden's favorite wife

-- Anonymous, February 16, 2002

Answers

I want what he's having.

-- Anonymous, February 16, 2002

I'm out of it. Who or what is batboy?

-- Anonymous, February 16, 2002

Meemur, BatBoy is like the Giant Rat of Sumatra, a creature which Sherlock Holmes declared the world wasn't ready for. The mainstream media have decided the world isn't ready for the often terrifying, yet recently inspiring, saga of BatBoy. Only the Weekly World News, confident in the maturity of its readership, has dared reveal the incredible story.

In an amazing turn of genetic events, which has our top scientists flummoxed (and "top scientists" are the only scientists the Weekly World News consults), a creature was discovered who was half bat and half boy. Anyone can tell this by looking at the many photographs of the creature in the WWN.

Without going into all the details of BatBoy's history, I can assure you that it has been both terrifying (he escaped from a high security U.S. Government facility, and no one knew who he would turn on and subject to a horrifying demise) and inspiring (he decided to turn on Osama, and received training as a U.S. Marine).

So now you know

-- Anonymous, February 16, 2002

Okay . . . thanks for the cultural update. I can see I'm getting behind again. Too many documents to edit . . .

-- Anonymous, February 16, 2002

You should have whatever he's having, Meems.

-- Anonymous, February 16, 2002

I am glad someone asked..............I was too embarrass to. :>)

-- Anonymous, February 16, 2002

Not as embarassed as me, Diane. I read the story before Peter posted it.

:(

-- Anonymous, February 17, 2002