FA look into Premiership's latast night of shame PA Sport

FA mandarins are to investigate claims that Liverpools Phil Thompson attempted to use foul play to gain advantage over Newcastle. The stand in coach refused to move for 20 pre match minutes as his nose obstructed the flood lighting at Anfield. During this time eery nasal sounds were played through the away dressing room to unsettle Newcastle's younger players, like Jenas. Also on a night of shame Thompson is blamed by Aaron Hughes for deliberatley placing his nose onto the pitch and curtailing his forward forages. Bobby Robson is quoted as saying "who nose where this will end? It's snot fair" Phil Thompson is said to have picked this tactic. It will run and run.

-- Anonymous, March 07, 2002