Just got this in my email and thought it was cute , hope you do to.

> > To those of us who have children in our lives, > > whether they are our > > own, > > > grandchildren, nieces and nephews, or > > students...here is something to > > make > > > you chuckle. Whenever your children are out of > > control, you can take > > > comfort from the thought that even God's > > omnipotence did not extend to > > His > > > own children. > > > After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam > > and Eve. And the > > first > > > thing he said was, "Don't". > > > "Don't what?" Adam replied. > > > "Don't eat the forbidden fruit." God said. > > > "Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey, > > Eve...we have forbidden > > > fruit!" > > > "No way!" says Eve > > > "Yes way!" says Adam > > > "DO NOT eat the fruit!" said God. > > > "Why?" Adam and Eve both ask. > > > "Because I am your father and I said so!" God > > replied, (wondering why > > he > > > hadn't stopped creation after making the > > elephants). A few minutes > > later, > > > God saw his children having an apple break and He > > was ticked! > > > "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God, as > > our first parent, > > asked. > > > "Uh huh," Adam replied. > > > "Then why did you?" said the Father. > > > "I don't know," said Eve. > > > "She started it!" Adam said. > > > "Did not!" said Eve. > > > "Did too!" > > > "DID NOT!" > > > Having had it with the two of them, God's > > punishment was that Adam and > > Eve > > > should have children of their own. > > > Thus, the pattern was set and it has never > > changed! > > > But there is reassurance in this story. > > > If you have persistently and lovingly tried to > > give children wisdom and > > > they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. > > If God had trouble > > > raising children, what makes you think it would be > > a piece of cake for > > > you? > > > Advice for the day: > > > If you have a lot of tension and you get a > > headache, do what it says on > > > the aspirin bottle: "Take two aspirin" and "Keep > > away from children." > > > You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching > > them to walk and > > talk. > > > Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to > > sit down and shut-up. > > > Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing > > your children. > > > Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their > > young. > > > Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they > > usually repeat > > word-for-word > > > exactly what you shouldn't have said. > > > The main purpose of holding children's parties is > > to remind yourself > > that > > > there are children more awful than your own. > > > I 'child-proofed' my home 25 years ago and they're > > still getting in! > > > Anyway, be nice to your children, they might > > choose your nursing home > > > someday. > > > > >

-- Patty {NY State} (fodfarms@hotmail.com), March 11, 2002

Answers

Too funny! The aspirin one is the best!!

-- Melissa in SE Ohio (me@home.net), March 11, 2002.

AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!

-- Melinda (speciallady104@hotmail.com), March 15, 2002.

One of the (many) things I learned when raising my two children was whenever something needs to be devided (i.e., the last piece of cake) let one cut and the other choose the first slice. My two would almost get out measuring devices to make sure one didn't get more than then other.

Wishing you enough.

-- Trevilians (Trevilians@attbi.net), March 15, 2002.