I been married for ten years during that time I been through verbal abuse mental abuse and physical abuse by my wife. I am disable due to a server heart problem and suffered a stroke afew years ago and my wife knew this but she hasn't stoped. She has accused me of having another women which I don't I tell her that when we first got married that I do not belive in cheating if I wanted to cheat then why would've married her then but she keeps inssisting that I am cheating. And now all the verbal and mental abuse turned into physical abuse. Which led to our seperation I have my three children because they wanted to stay with me. and she has her oldest daughter with her. Now that I am filing for a divorce I would like to know what are the chances of her getting the children. When there is reports with my local police department of abuse against me and the children. Please help.

-- Anonymous, March 22, 2002

Answers

Hi: I'm sorry to hear about your situation. It's far too common for the courts to favour the mother in these cases. If you have reports of violence by your wife towards you and the children, that may help you. The legal system tends to function with the premise that the woman will win in court based only on he said, she said evedence. Her lawyer will probably tell her that as the mother, she will probably get the kids. This kind of arrogant approach by their side can sometimes cause them to mount a weak case. You should try your hardest to win in this matter. You may not have tradition on your side but you do have "right" and that is sometimes spotted by a fair judge. The best of luck to you.

-- Anonymous, March 24, 2002