If you could have anything done to your person in terms of plastic surgery or other forms of body alterment, what would you have done?

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2002

Answers

I would have laser eye surgery so I could have perfect vision and live a life free of glasses or contacts. I would be able to see underwater without goggles, and be able to surf/boogie board without worrying about my contacts floating away. I'll probably get my eyes done when the surgery becomes a little more routine.

I've also thought about getting a nose job, simply because I have the worst sinus problems every year, and maybe changing the shape of my flat nose would help. I don't have any cartilage in my nose, and maybe the flatness obstructs breathing or something.

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2002

I don't think the plastic surgeons can help much with this one but it's worth a shot anyway: muscle. I could use some. I suppose if I could gain a little weight I might be able to magically turn that into 'muscle', but until that happens I'll just keep on wishin'.

Before, I used to be a little hazukashii about my shark fin of a nose but over time I've come to terms with it.

And maybe it would be nice to get that 3rd ear removed from my back someday....

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2002

I don't plan to ever have any cosmetic surgery, but in the olden days, if hard pressed, I would most certainly have said boobs. I'd want them made smaller and perkier. But the other day I watched a surgery of someone having that done, and I thought I was going to throw up all over my Freschetta. It was disgusting and wrong. So my new answer is a question . . . Is there any way they could make my second toes shorter than my first ones?

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2002

I almost forgot about Jaimee's has monkey toes. She could use chopsticks with those things, man.

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2002

I was watching "True Life: Plastic Surgery" on MTV one time, and a guy wanted more muscular calves, so he got implants. He thought they were so cool and made him "the perfect package", but I just kept thinking that he had gotten a boob job in his legs.

I think I have too much muscle. My dad had to have surgery a couple years ago to remove some of his calf muscles since they were too big and obstructing proper blood flow to his legs. Since I was "lucky" enough to have inherited these manly Lugod calves, I wonder if I'll have the same problem later on in life. I wish I wasn't shaped like my dad as much, I guess. Although it was kind of cool to have bragging rights around the weight room in high school (in which I bench pressed 140 lbs. and squatted 220 lbs.), it made me feel like some kind of man-beast. I'd gladly trade in some muscle for added height. Is there a pawn shop around that would do something like that for me?

-- Anonymous, April 20, 2002