Buffalo Theory

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Okay this is potentially for the guys, yes, I know some of you women will like it too! Anyway, since we are all in such good humor I thought I would add another one.

The Buffalo Theory:

I have not seen anyone explain this as well as Cliff Clavin, on the sitcom CHEERS. One afternoon at CHEERS, Cliff was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went:

"Well, ya see Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members."

"In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine."

"That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."t too! I'm not sexist, really, I'm not!

-- Susan in MN (nanaboo@paulbunyan.net), May 07, 2002


Susan that's too funny!

-- Jackie (HaloHead012@cs.com), May 07, 2002.

My two remaining brain cells (they survive on the buddy system )and I will drink to that. I have often wondered why barstools are so high, yet drunks seldom fall off of them. :>) And after a few beers is when I get "sexy"......sexy as "fat bastard" in "Austin Powers" :>)

-- Jay Blair in N. AL (jayblair678@yahoo.com), May 07, 2002.

That's funny, Susan. Thanks for the laugh.

-- Jodie in TX (stanchnmotion@yahoo.com), May 08, 2002.

Sounds like a perfectly sound theory to me. Now, "why do wimmin always get better looking by closing time"?

-- Joe (CactusJoe001@AOL.com), May 08, 2002.

>>>"why do wimmin always get better looking by closing time"? <<<

Well "Duh". Too many 12oz curls.....

-- Jodie in TX (stanchnmotion@yahoo.com), May 08, 2002.

Well, one day 'fishing' is long enough. The answer to "why do wimmin always get better looking by closing time" according to the The Buffalo Theory (which is the subject of this thread) would be:

1. By closing time all the inferior, dumb, brain cells are dead. 2. With only real smart ones remaining, they can see and understand at a higher level. 3. At this higher level of conscientiousness, the inner beauty shines through and thus, the answer to the question.

Now that has taken a lot of inferior cell killing to come up with that answer.

-- Joe (CactusJoe001@AOL.com), May 09, 2002.

...I'm guessing the inferior cells then....miraculously revitalize in the morning? And thus, cause the inferior and desperate act of "chewing-yer-arm-off-to-escape-rather-than-wake-him/her!", also known as "coyote-ugly"?

yup, must be those slow cells. ;)

-- Patty (SycamoreHollow@aol.com), May 09, 2002.

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