Poise - Grace - Dignity

greenspun.com : LUSENET : Catholic : One Thread

As Catholic Christians how do we define poise grace and dignity in our following Christ?

For myself poise is the manner of a person who is able to hold his/her head erect withought demeaning another.

Grace to me is the acceptable social skills of communication(s) to another in attempts to release that person of delusions that cause pain.

Dignity to me is that of knowing who you are without pride.

What are your " definitions " please?

-- Jean Bouchard (jeanb@cwk.imag.net), June 19, 2002

Answers

Hi Jean :)

Dignity is knowing when to walk away and being able to do so in a way that leaves you and the other person with your dignity in tact.

That, I believe is one way of doing things the Lord's way.

Love, MaryLu

-- MaryLu (mlc327@juno.com), June 19, 2002.


Hi Jean, I think will leave this forum to perhaps find Catholics more my own age and level of understanding. I feel a bit out of place and I think I am doing myself more harm than good on balance. Much of what is discussed here is beyond me.

We all know a certain indivdual bugs the hell out of me with his attitude to those who differ from him. I do respect his intelligence and knowledge but you just shouldnt treat people like he does. Basic manners. Basic respect. Basic human decency. The classic moral question how to treat someone who is obnoxious towards others.

Tit for tat works fine for me to achieve a balance of power between individuals, but the problem is really when one party escalates beyond this. That leads to feuding and an endless cycle of getting back at the other guy.Then the only way to break the cycle is to interpose forgiveness, or just walk away. This is especially true when the original bad act was not calculated, but reckless, heedless or blindly emotional.

However this is not the case here. He doesnt just blow a fuse, he is genuinely nasty person sometimes. When people COLDLY CHOOSE to treat you like shit on the assumption they will get what they want and you can't or won't fight back - I say get out the hammer and smash 'em . Unfortunately most cold-hearted bastards pick on people with less power to do them harm, giving them the edge in an all-out war.

I have got myself ticked off here before when I tried to smash this person. So I will not give him what he deserves, at least not unless he really drives me crazy.

Jean I hope you are not too upset with his antics.Why waste your time & mental effort on someone who is a knob? They don't deserve any attention from a man of your compassion and love. Furthermore, just remind yourself THEY HAVE TO LIVE WITH THEIR REPELLENT PERSONALITY EVERYDAY, YOU DON'T. Best to keep away is my advice. God Bless Courtenay

-- KG (csisherwood@hotmail.com), June 20, 2002.


Good Morning Courtenay :)

What a great post that was. You are truly an asset to this forum as is Jean. We need you here.

Have a good day! MaryLu

-- MaryLu (mlc327@juno.com), June 20, 2002.


Dear Courtenay,

Please do not leave this forum because you have much to offer. We learn from the young and old alike. Your perspectives on life and faith are a "breath of fresh air."

Sometimes the air gets stale and doesn't always smell so nice, then you come in like an 'air-freshner' and the air is sweet again.

I, too, was thinking of leaving the forum, but decided it would be wrong to give certain people that power over me. We all learn from each other, we all have something to offer, we all get our bad days.

After giving the matter further consideration, I decided it is easier to just ignore those posts that are offensive. I can read them, but do not have to answer. I don't have to attend every angry party I am invited to. I can choose to say no, I don't want to go there.

So, please stay, Courtenay. There are knowledgeable people of the Catholic Faith who have much to teach us here.

God Bless you, May Our Good Lord Wrap his arms around you today and let you know how much you are loved and welcomed wherever you go.

MaryLu :)

-- MaryLu (mlc327@juno.com), June 20, 2002.


Like many here I also have found myself wanting to leave this forum due to above mentioned antics. I keep coming back for in my heart I hear kindness and gentleness will always overcome.

I work volunteer with children and young adults who are termed slashers - self mutilation - and hear so often of the rantings and ravings of a truly pyschotic parent/relative/or??.

My function is to have these patients not so much confront there anger rather to express it and allow it to eventually become manageble which is the goal for all of us.

I truly believe Eugene is deeply disturbed in the area of meglomania - I am the Centre - and arrogance based on yet another insecurity. He has not matured to the point of having the ability to have relations with his peers.

There are many fine minds - Fred Chrsi Butlere come immediatly to mind and others - here with heart and compassion who are aware we all are travelling a path of hope.

Courtney do not leave please as wisdom and understanding come in many forms which is evident from your post. We need you here for some of us old goats to listen and learn from our youth.

Remember a definition(s) of the following I was given when studying Frued. A pyschotic builds castles in the air - A neurotic pays the rent.

Peace And Well Being

-- Jean Bouchard (jeanb@cwk.imag.net), June 20, 2002.



Thank you, Jean, beautifuland articulate as always :) MaryLU

-- MaryLu (mlc327@juno.com), June 20, 2002.

Dear MaryLu,
You're usually in a loving mood; and so I come near you to ask about one statement you make here:

''I, too, was thinking of leaving the forum, but decided it would be wrong to give certain people that power over me. We all learn from each other, we all have something to offer, we all get our bad days.''

If I am the one you are afraid will have ''power'' to drive you to leave, YES-- It would be wrong to let me have such power. I agree, you mustn't leave, because it might seem I drove you out.

In fact, though; I've never tried to make anybody leave. My purpose is never to hurt anyone, or strike at him/her till they choose to get out. I welcome you- and Fred, and Jean and Courtenay. Give what God lets you give. And allow me to give as God lends me the grace. I'm not asking for a special place. I'm not dictating to you, or anyone else. I have plain disagreements with a few of our posters.

If my opinion isn't wanted, just because it isn't couched in tender words, (''May Our Good Lord Wrap his arms around you today and let you know how much you are loved and welcomed wherever you go.'')-- It may be then, that I could FLATTER my way into all your hearts. Just get up close and ''personal'', and say to Kiwi, ''Come, 'ere-- Gimme a KISS, Darling Boy;''

But this is a Catholic forum. We share things with each other that ought to promote faith in God, and faith in Christ's Holy Church. We aren't necessarily here to ''stroke'' each other. I don't log on in the morning at the Catholic forum to learn how much I'm LOVED by the others. I want to discuss God-- the Catholic faith-- good and evil, right and wrong.

Yet, these are the words I'm paid back with:

[He, Eugene, COLDLY CHOOSE(s) to treat you like shit on the assumption they will get what they want and you can't or won't fight back - I say get out the hammer and smash 'em . Unfortunately most cold-hearted bastards [EUGENE, MaryLu] pick on people with less power to do them harm.''

SO! He can't take the hammer and smash me, because he's in New Zealand. Jean Bouchard has no way to ''slap me silly'', because he's in Canada. But, the wish is there, in the hearts of these ''Catholics''. The ''good'' people you're shmoozing with today, ML. -- Nice crew!

-- eugene c. chavez (chavezec@pacbell.net), June 20, 2002.


Kiwi

I will say this to you. Try to take life in the manner as Jeffrey said to you and simply throw out the stones in the rock pile that are in your way one at a time. It is the best way to tackle all of the problems and obstacles that get in the way of your desire to spirituality. It is how I have done it for years and it works well. As you remove the stones one at a time the weight on your soul will become lighter and lighter. Just keepin mind that the load will never be completely gone as it is also GOD who is testing you each and every day to return your love to him without any complaint too. Remember the things I will tell you here from scripture

In the Lords prayer: "Lead us not into temptation". Mount of Olives: "Pray not to be put to the test." God will never give us more than we will be able to handle each and every day. If we do not tackle the load simply by prayer or some simple deed it will then overpower us and that will become our own fault for not listening and working on our salvation.

The prayer of Christ at the Mount of Olives (Luke 22:40: "---Let your will be done not mine." Obviously we want to please GOD and to receive his many graces as well. If we tackle the things standing in our way one at a time we will, hopefully, achieve the salvation which GOD will give us at the hour of our death.

So do not despair, but seek God and you will see him in due time and lo and behold you will be happier. I do this each and every day and it works.

Blessings. "

-- Fred Bishop (FCB@heartland.com), June 20, 2002.


Oh yes, one more thing. I also keep my rosary prayers in mind and a Hail Mary now and then helps to keep the mind focused too. It is incredible how a little motherly love helps.

-- Fred Bishop (FCB@heartland.com), June 20, 2002.

Thanks Mary Lu and Jean , Fred you amaze me I really disliked you when I first came here but I have grown to love you. I hope to read much more from you. I promise to shut up and just read for for a while! God Bless Courtenay

-- KG (csisherwood@hotmail.com), June 22, 2002.


Courtney

I DON'T want you to "SHUT UP". I want you to help me to help you and in return I will learn too. It is the full circle of discussion that helps me to learn as well. You have many problems and I hope to help you to see and I also need to see more than I do now. For faith is a never ending trip on a long road to heaven. It never stops and it has many curves in it that are testing points planted with satan's temptations and lessons from GOD to test our LOVE for HIM. When we accept HIM we are following HIM above our desires to be what satan wants. It is the rejection of our liberal needs that shows our love for GOD and not our personal desires. All of this takes time to absorb and takes a lifetime to maintain. Trusting GOD is easy once you get to know him. He lifts us up daily whenever we chose to look HIS way and snub the ways of the evil one.

Blessings.

Blessings.

-- Fred Bishop (FCB@heartland.com), June 22, 2002.


Moderation questions? read the FAQ