strap in kids, this is going to be a LONG trip...

A call out. I can't believe this. After everything I've done for you people, between selling crack for quarters, cleaning rich people's floors with my hair, and sleeping on pavement, there are still detractors. *Sobs hysterically* Oh well, no matter. You all have waited so patiently for my reasons, well, the wait is over. Why is FF7 the bastard child of the entire series?

No good final villian: Sephiroth was not evil. Megalomaniac? Yes. Vengeful? Yes. Not entirely there? Yes. Evil? No. I would go ape-shit too if I found out the stuff he did. Anybody would. He just had the power to make his revenge good. Truth be told, I think that Rufus and Heidigger were more evil than Sephiroth.

Most annoying cast in the series: I hate Aeris and Cait-Sith just for breathing. Barret is a crybaby that tries to act like Mr. T. Cloud is pretty much your typical bad Final Fantasy lead. Name me 3 differences between his personality and Squall's and Cecil's. They're all really good people deep down, they just don't know how to express their true feelings yadda yadda yadda...*yawn*. The best character in that game was Red XIII. Square was trying to tell you something when they made a doggy smarter than Cloud. hmmmmmm....

Stupid (little) things you have to do: "Okay, now we all have to hit the button at the same time!", "Practice marching for Rufus!", "Have to get those leg-squats right!" *yawns again*. Is there some purpose to this? Other than being annoying? I play Final Fantasy for storyline, good fighting, and because they're good games. Not for these meaningless little tests of skill that yield little to no result. The king of all of this was when you dress Cloud up like a woman. We could have accomplished this feat in no time, but instead, you have to run around the sector forever just to dress the fag up like a fag. *yawn*

Knights of the Round: Okay, here's a hot button for me. Emerald Weapon was a joke. If you're going to make a summon that's good for ONLY one thing, make sure that you have to use it. I beat Emerald Weapon the first time I fought it WITHOUT using KOTR. How? Ha ha, look around the board. You tell me. I absolutely OWN FF8, but I still can't tackle Omega Weapon without using Holy War.

Inferior ability system: FF9, FF8, FF6 = good ability system. FF7 and FF10 = sucky ability system. You learn tricks by LITTLE MAGIC BALLS that plug into your weapons and armor?.........mmm.....okay, so why do you magically forget these nifty tricks when you take the LITTLE MAGIC BALLS out of your equipment? FF9's ability system was flawless. More like FF1's. Zidane can't learn how to summon or use black magic, no matter how hard you try. He shouldn't be able to. HE'S A THIEF. His weapons and armor use AP to teach him abilities that are dormant within him like how to steal more effectively, escape from battle, and counterattack. Not how to cast "Quake" and use blue magic. Better than that? HE WON'T FORGET HOW TO USE THEM WHEN YOU GIVE HIM BETTER EQUIPMENT.

Slightly less than cool hidden characters: Ooh! Ow! Why did I bring THIS up when I get SO upset talking about it? Hidden characters are God. I'm mad enough that there aren't more of them in more Final Fantasies. But Yuffie and Vincent are enough to make me piss blood. Without a strategy guide or someone telling you, how the hell would you know to land on that barely visible island, LOSE a fight to the Zone Eater in a particular manner, and then scour his belly for Gogo? I wouldn't have. Now, this is me driving toward Red's hometown. Lalalalala, oops! *bumps into mystery ninja*. Wow. That was difficult. That, and let's have a coolness contest. Umaro and Gogo vs. Yuffie and Vincent...yeah, the results on that contest have been in for 5 years now.

Annoying soundtrack: Aside from "One Winged Angel", the soundtrack all sounded mechanical and recycled to me. I walked around with my TV on mute for the better part of the game. Another big part of the reason for me playing these games is for the soundtrack, and I own the soundtracks and compilations to 1, 4, 6, 8, 9, and 10. Hm...there seems to be one missing. It's not that I just didn't like the game. I don't care MUCH for 10, but it's soundtrack is amazing. My "Music Appreciation" professor must be rolling in her grave...

Now, make no mistake. I could go on. This is not difficult for me. This post took me all of 10 minutes to think up and type. I haven't even touched on the inconsistencies in the storyline, the overwhelming sense of BOREDOM that normally overtook me, the flashbacks that lasted for hours, etc. etc. Also, don't get confused. There are things about the game I do like. I'd get into that, but this has gone on for long enough. And as far as the uncool new kid on the board (whatever your name is, Growa Hard-on), I gave you your chance. I told you to go ahead and tell me why you liked this game so much. You elected instead to tell me about the other stupid kids that don't like this game, and how much you don't like me. You just lost your first opportunity on this board to get any respect from the Final Fantasy Messiah. That would be me. I know this game. Now, there are better individuals at certain games. Link was better at Tactics, DarkShadow and ArchPyro are probably better at 10, and someone at the old board claimed they beat Omega without Holy War. But when it comes to overall knowledge, honed skill, years of practice, and walking on water on 1,4,5,6,7,8,9,10, and Tactics, I AM THE JESUS. So go ahead. Try and make up for your blown opportunity. We're all (not) listening...

*dunh dunh dunh dunh another one bites the dust*

long enough? you were all warned...

-- Anonymous, July 12, 2002

Answers

That was pretty good AO.

Um, back to FF6, whats this about a guy named Gogo? How do I get him?

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2002

Now that is easy... Go to a small island god knows where after the cataclysm you only find worms, let it suck all your people in, fight ure way to the end and watch out for leprechauns. I wasn't told how to do this i went there cos they give you 10 magic pointy things and it back attacked me and sucked my team down and wow, i found it...

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2002

Go south of the Veldt in the WOR, and land at an island that looks like a triangle. wander around there, and you'll eventually meet a giant worm like thingy, who will EAT your party. you'll land in a cave, and have to navigate your way through a maze....and at the end, you meet Gogo, who joins your party. Personally, I think it would have been cooler if you had to FIGHT gogo before he/she/it'd join your party....And, I didnt use a strat guide to figure this out, there's a Pirate in Miranda in the WOR who tells you of a "strage beast in an island south of the Veldt", so i went there to explore...i didnt use a strat guide the whole game...

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2002

Not to mention that you could customize Gogo within an inch of his life. You won't be able to give him any Espers, but I taught him Blitzes, Lores, and other cool stuff. My personal favorite is throwing stuff. I just wish that there were more Tack Stars in the game. I think that Colosseum aside, you can find 3 if you look REALLY hard...

That's the gist!

-- Anonymous, July 13, 2002