Sex in marriage, what's right and what's wrong?

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Ther catholic teaching (precana) is that the married couple may do most anything in sex but any act must be completed by transfer of life, in other words the male must deposit within the vagina. Is climax other then within the vagina ever approved? Is mutual masterbation to climax forbidden in marrage even if a couple is beyond child bearing age?

-- Don Copenhagen (dcopenhagen@stsbiopolymers.com), October 02, 2002

Answers

Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

If I misinterpret your passage, please forgive me:

It seems like you aren't really interested in the spirit of the law, and simply wish to fullfill the letter of the law in order to "feel" (at least) that you aren't violating the Catholic Church. In otherwords, to be frank, it sounds like you want to gratify yourself without "breaking the rules". However, this is impossible.

Sex is an awesome gift from God, which must be taken as such. That is to say, sex is the very part of a marriage which truly makes you and your spouse "one flesh". And as this marriage bond is a forshadowing of our Marriage bond in Heaven with Jesus Christ, our Heavenly Spouse, it cannot be a simple tool used for satisfying the flesh. Rather, it should be the most uplifting and spiritually satisfying event that could ever take place, next to knowing God. It is the complete and unadulterated GIVING of yourslef for the other, and not in the least bit taking of the other for oneself. Because Christ (the Groom) GAVE himself to us completely as a sacrafice for our sins (and he continues to GIVE himself to us completely in the Eucharist) He showed us how to truly be a husband.

Therefore, ask yourself a simple question: Am I doing this for me, and am I giveing myself COMPLETELY? If there is any doubt, I'm sure your conscience will let you know.

In Christ.

-- Jake Huether (jake_huether@yahoo.com), October 02, 2002.


Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Jake H. is right. Deliberate abuse of the sexual faculty is always a mortal sin, regardless of whether conception is possible.

If I may make a suggestion, it might be better to make such a personal query privately to a priest than to pose it in a public forum.

-- jake (jake__@msn.com), October 03, 2002.


Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Oops.

-- jake (jake__@msn.com), October 03, 2002.

Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

The way I see it , having sex or making love:

It's something private between a (married) couple , no one else has the right to stick his nose in their business / private moment !!!!

That's the way I see it !!!!

Greets from a NON BELIEVER:

-- Laurent LUG. (.@...), October 03, 2002.


Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Sorry Laurent, but you're wrong. "Making Love" is consummating the covenant made BEFORE GOD between a man and a woman. It is not up to the couple to determine which acts are OK. God makes that determination.

-- Glenn (glenn@nospam.com), October 04, 2002.


Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Glenn , If I knew my neighbor had sex with someone else as his wife , I won't stop them , but instead of , I'll warn his wife , so he can suffer the consequences !!!! __ ONLY , if see a rape , I'll "stick" my nose in the creep business , because that's a dirty rotten physical low crime !!!! Such guys deserve a free castration !!!!

But about "NORMAL" sex , when in a married couple , the wife says no sex today , that means also NO , is that also a determination from .... !!!!

Sorry I ask !!

Greets from a NON BELIEVER:

-- Laurent LUG. (.@...), October 04, 2002.


Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Great answer Jake thanks. Hi Laurent that determination comes from "free will" that God gives to every human being. That said If I get married I dont think Ill lose much sleep worrying about going to hell for such matters, Ill take my chances in my own moral conscience here.

-- Kiwi (csisherwood@hotmail.com), October 04, 2002.

Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Why I feel the need to offer my worthless opinions in the face of something God has spoken on bugs me. Surely my heart should reflect Gods will if I examine it enough?

-- Kiwi (csisherwood@hotmail.com), October 04, 2002.

Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Maybe Don just really wants to know what's allowed and what isn't. These things are not always self-evident. I think the answer to your actual question Don is "no" but certainly its something to take up with a priest who will be able to answer your questions fully. Don't worry, he's done it before, many many times. Won't surprise him. I think its laudable that you care enough to think about it and try to find out.

-- (a@a.com), October 07, 2002.

Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

I absolutely agree, a@a. I think the question asker has been misunderstood and his character needlessly called into question.

Questions like this need to be asked and answered so the person can fall into line with the truth. There is no sin in this.

I personally think, though, that consultation someone (a good priest) is best, or other good reading resources would provide the better answer.

-- (123@456.zzzz), October 07, 2002.



Response to Sex in marrage, what's right and what's wrong?

Laurent,

Didn't mean to come down hard on you. I admire your actions on the two situations you described after my original post (informing the wife of her husband's affair, and trying to stop a rape). However, my original answer still stands. God makes the determination of what is right or wrong always, even in a married couple's bedroom.

As for Don, I'll repeat what others are saying. You need to discuss this with your priest. Or go to another church if you are worried about discussing your question with a priest who knows you.

-- Glenn (glenn@nospam.com), October 07, 2002.


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