I was married one time by a Catholic Priest, had 3 disasterous marriages, and now at 58 am finally married to the right person.

I am looking for A Church to Attend again, I had 12 years of Catholic School so of course that would be first choice but I have had bad choices of men.

The marriage I am in now is number four, I am 58, was recently in the hospital and Annointed by Women from A Catholic Church and I Felt so good, I would do anything to live my life over, but I know I cannot do this.

Are all these marriages Valid in the Catholic Church, or is just the first one Valid. Would I be going after one Annulment or 3, I know I could never get three, but if it was one, then maybe I would do this, I would really like to, I just would like to know if this is possible. Ginny

-- Ginny Moore (CrochetGin@yahoo.com), December 28, 2002

Answers

Each marriage holds it's unique status. In general, a marriage whether civil or blessed by the Church is considered valid until proven otherwise. The best way to approach the issue, is to get good advise from you local priest or marriage tribunal in your diocese. It may be a relatively lengthy process, but one that will be well worth it in the long run.

Life gets complicated and many times we get pulled along or sometimes dragged along by circumstances beyond our control.

I admire your courage in this. Whatever you do, God is blessing you. Keeping striving to do what God wants you to do. You'll feel it, when it's there.

I'll pray for you. John

-- john placette (jplacette@catholic.org), December 29, 2002.

Jmj

Hello, Ginny. Welcome back (I hope) to active participation in the life of the Catholic Church!

Because you wished to celebrate the sacrament of Marriage in the Catholic Church many years ago, the Church still recognizes your "first" marriage and only that one, presuming it to be valid until the contrary is proved.

Since you are no longer living with the man who was with you in that wedding, and since you would like to "regularize" your current "union" (if that is possible), you need to do a few things:
(1) register at your local Catholic parish,
(2) make an appointment to visit the pastor to discuss your entire situation and to be reconciled to God (if that is possible),
(3) petition the diocesan tribunal (marriage court) to consider all the facts surrounding your first "union," to see whether or not you entered into a valid marriage.

[continued below]

-- J. F. Gecik (jfgecik@hotmail.com), December 29, 2002.

[continued from above]

If you did not enter into a valid marriage many years ago, the tribunal will grant you a Declaration of Nullity, probably leaving you free to marry (for real) for the first time in your life. The reason for my slight uncertainty is that you did not say whether you formally left the Church at any time, stating that you are no longer Catholic or stating that you are now a member of "X" religion or denomination. If you remained Catholic, but just non-practicing, then I think that the tribunal can quickly dismiss your 2nd, 3rd, and 4th attempts to marry as patently invalid -- because you did not follow the required "canonical form" used in Catholic sacramental marriage. (However, I am not a canon lawyer, so you may find that I am partly mistaken about this.) A complication could arise, making one of your later "marriages" appear potentially valid, if you formally left the Catholic Church after your first divorce.

God bless you.
John
PS: Whatever that "anointing" you received was, it was not the sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick (formerly called Extreme Unction), which can be administered only by a priest or bishop.
PPS: Please be aware of the need for further tribunal work if the man whom you now love was previously married to someone else that is still alive.

-- J. F. Gecik (jfgecik@hotmail.com), December 29, 2002.