Um, hi. ive from a website that has gained some notoriety for its " world renowned rockstar penis chart" which we use as a guideline for groupies to seek out their conquests, however, we've gotten alot of letters regarding the superficial nature of this from many self imposed " more intelligent" groupies and we've come to the decision that in order to appease these wretches that we should make a chart which lists the IQ's of all rockstars. we already have quite a few, surprisingly ( from even more suprisingly valid sources....) anyway, we got an obscure request for some guy named " Dylan carlson" from some band named " Earth". so if anybody could help us out with this information, please respond. thank you!

regards, Eliza Stefanapolous

some rockstar IQs:

Bob Dylan: 156 fred durst: 98 Chino Moreno: 116 Jon Bon Jovi: 108 Ozzy Osbourne: 103 ( taken some years back ) Corey taylor: 105 Courtney Love: 134 Wayne Newton: 101 jonathan davis: 120 Jim Morrison: 164 brian eno: 144 jack white: 119

-- Anonymous, June 19, 2003

Answers

lol how odd.

anyway, citing an English interview between someone from some UK magazine, Dylan Carlson and Ian Mcgilliot ( sic ) that took place moments before their worst/best performance in Europe, it seems that Dylan is " highly intelligent" yet has a tendency to " speak slowly and trail off when talking". Personally i believe that someone who had such a visionary and deconstructive outlook on rock music, such as Carlson, would have to possess some pretty brilliant mental capacities. Anybody agree/disagree? btw... what the fuck is Wayne Newton doing on this list of " Rockstar IQs"?

-- Anonymous, June 20, 2003